First Loss

I was starving
in the most middle class, American,
pre-teen way you could imagine.

We were headed to a restaurant 
Applebees I think
I was sitting behind the driver
My mother

A phone rang and someone answered it
I could hear panic on the other line

I could picture her saying the words
into her crimson samsung juke...
"Levi was in a car accident"

We took the next exit to head towards the hospital

Confusion

To this day I don't know if I was being sheltered
from the truth

Or if everyone was as lost as I was

Lost 

That's how I felt as I wondered
How sun kissed cheeks could look so pale

The cramped waiting room they shoved us in
Wasn't big enough for the words the Doctor spoke

"He's gone"

I sunk in my chair

I was somehow worried my actions would be deemed 
Inappropriate 
Uncouth

As if there was an improper way to mourn

How was I to know?

I had never lost anyone before.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2019

Poem

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