fire

bliss ignition renewal continual fire without smoke birthing cool heat unifies polarities ~ in the cave of our heart being mistook we burn the book that boundaries blur for soul to sparkle as luminescence ~ at the stillness point triad of energies immanent and transcendent enabled for bilocation alchemically transmutes fabric of consciousness ~ living light eternal

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

thriveni c mysore

Date: 6/14/2025 2:40:00 AM

Oh dear seeker! you add that divinity here in this difficult form of poetry. I loved this line ' boundaries blur for soul to sparkle' Lovely write dear gifted poet. Congratulations on your win. Three cheers!!! Happy writing.

Unseeking Seeker
Date: 6/14/2025 5:07:00 AM

Thank you, TCM

Suzette Richards

Date: 6/14/2025 12:32:00 AM

Congratulations Seeker on your 3rd place win. The poem embraces paradoxes of fire, weaving metaphysical and sensory elements and is conceptually strong. Perhaps refining the transitions between abstract and tangible imagery could enhance intuitive engagement. Overall, an enjoyable read. Su

Suzette Richards
Date: 6/14/2025 11:04:00 PM

For example: "unifies polarities ~ / in the cave of our heart" these are distinct images. If it could perhaps be smoothed out with a metaphorical phrase using the imagery? Something along the lines of the 4 chambers of the heart - each distinct in its function, but still part of the whole. Then it might aid the preceding lines to relax into enjambment instead of each line being standalone thoughts. It was not a contest requirement to have a layout of the words on the page - hence me giving different depictions in my 4 example poems: Air, Earth, Fire, and Earth.

Unseeking Seeker
Date: 6/14/2025 2:08:00 AM

somehow I don’t resonate with shapes and fragmentation of lines, if that’s what you mean ~ why not paint instead then? (my thoughts) i am happy you liked the poem enough to place it Suzette. thank you!

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 5/16/2025 11:17:00 PM

Quite a good poem. I am kind of clueless with this particular contest. I think yours passes muster.

Unseeking Seeker
Date: 5/16/2025 11:39:00 PM

Nah ~ mine is just a shot in the dark! I’ve yet to gather courage to enter it.