Fine Print

I shoulda read the fine print
when I married you.
A tyrant waited in disguise.
If I only knew.

It would have warned, "Mammy's boy"
Her favourite out of eight.
He knows not how to wash a dish,
or remove ashes from the grate.

It also might have warned me
of his obsession with food we ate.
Complaining about the ingredients,
'till I was in a state.

Money he worked hard for
all the live long day.
But he kept it all for himself.
I was not privy to his pay.

He only wanted one child.
How mean could that be?
After vowing at our wedding
to procreate with me.

He was not fond of touching
or cuddling and all that craic.
Claiming his skin was too sensitive,
when we were in the sack.

He kept me at arm's length
emotionally for twenty years.
All conversations were chit chat.
Beneath were all our fears.

I'm laughing now when I look back,
to think what I lived through.
I shoulda read the fine print
when I married you.

22/01/2018
Copyright © | Year Posted 2018

Poem

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Gauthier Avatar
March 1, 2018 at 8:22 AM
Wow, Jean. What a delightful and touching write. A winner for sure.
Murray Avatar
March 1, 2018 at 8:25 AM
Hi Line. It's been eight years since we split and we have not spoken in six years. Still, I could not resist sending him this on Messenger. Then blocking him!
Roper Avatar
February 28, 2018 at 5:39 PM
Back with congratulations on your win.
Murray Avatar
February 28, 2018 at 6:01 PM
Thank you Eve, I didn't know. I'm pleased as Punch.
Roper Avatar
February 15, 2018 at 3:21 PM
Jean, you express yourself very well... good write and good luck in the contest... Hugs Eve
Marcum Wong Avatar
January 24, 2018 at 6:07 PM
I loved this creative expression of regrets Jean. You hide the grief with humor in such an impressive way. I hope to see this poem take top honors! Superbly penned! : )
Murray Avatar
January 25, 2018 at 1:25 AM
Good morning from rainy Ireland Connie. I don't think it will pass muster as the required "funny" stipulated, but I always enjoy the experience of expressing myself this way. Thank you as always for your supportive encouraging comments.
Bauer Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 5:27 PM
excellent! you've said it all so well here, jean, although it's very sad. still, a bit of humor adds just the right touch...
Murray Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 5:31 PM
It is sad if I think about it too much Ilene. I try to focus on our daughters and the love they provided when he had none to give.
Shaw Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 4:12 PM
Well written Jean, I really enjoyed reading your poem, Sad but written with honesty and humour, kindest regards, Kevin x
Murray Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 4:58 PM
Thank you Kevin.
Pandit Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 7:25 AM
Well written Jean. I did smile at times, reading this story, though it is sad...because it paints a picture that is familiar to many..best for a win
Murray Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 7:30 AM
Thank you Vijay. I have to be emotionally involved in my poetry. I am no good with words alone. Weirdly, I really enjoyed writing this one. I must be getting over him...
Allison Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 6:32 AM
Ouch jean that is such a sad sad poem and I guess that many can relate to parts of it (I can with a guy I went out with who was also a mammy's boy!!!) - need to review marriage contracts in case of future needs! Good luck in the contest:-) hugs jan xx
Murray Avatar
January 22, 2018 at 6:43 AM
He's a constant source of inspiration, that husband of mine. 23 years is a big chunk of my life I guess. I know "funny" was the requirement and I shouldn't laugh, but what a pantomime. Like you Jan, I must follow where my muse leads.
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