Jeanna York Poet Lyric

Fading

Fading

There he stood at my door
Waiting for me to join him 
In the secret room
I really didn’t know
That it wasn’t for him that I was going
He was being paid 
For me to please one of his friends
Here I was six years old
&

Fading

My best friend and I 
We knew each others pain
Yet we never talked about it
An unspoken understanding
We both just wanted to forget about it
She was my rock and I was hers
She was my voice of reason
I brought her out of her shell
Now she is gone and I am

Fading

As more memories come crashing in
Like intruders in the night
They are capturing my thoughts 
Breaking my heart 
I feel like I am falling apart 
Out of control 
Voices in my head tell me to go 
But I don’t want to
Even though 
I am 

Fading

I still have a little fight in me
I refuse to let go
Maybe that is the strength my therapist 
Sees in me
Even though I feel so weak
Broken down and beaten
I can’t even sleep
As I am slowly 

Fading 

I try to smile 
I try to put on a happy face 
So the world won’t see
The sadness inside 
Yet this depression is getting hard to hide
I want to move on 
I want to find that happiness 
I once had a glimpse of
It is hard to see though
When I feel like I am 

Fading 

So here again I am flashing back
This time I was seven
I said I wouldn’t go to the room
I wanted to play with my rabbit instead
So my dad he walked over
Picked up my rabbit and 
Snapped his neck
Then told me I could play with him
Instead
I didn’t cry I knew better than that
My heart was broken all the same
And as I come back to the present
I start to cry
For a little girl I have hidden inside
Then the voices get louder 
As I start

Fading

I want so bad to pick up the phone 
And call my grandma 
Lord knows she was more like a mom to me
Then I remember 
She has passed on 
And although I really miss her 
I know she would want me to carry on
Continue on my journey
To find peace & serenity
I know she wouldn’t want me to give in
So I stand and fight 
Even though 
I feel like heck 
So sad and depressed 
I hate myself more than anyone else
So maybe that is why I feel like 
I am 

Fading

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment