Explanation of You

What’s my story? 
It is brown eyes staring back at me.
It is attention to my mind to my libido
To my nemesis
Which is you

Lying in your own nakedness
Waiting—longing—for me to kiss you

But in my own disillusion I see you as 
Me—a fantasy which I love to ponder on—
Us as one

How beautiful it could be 
This hidden ignominy—
Immorality invalidating my mortality
With your sex inside of me, my mouth
My body, my all—
Worshipping another triumph—
But in truth a failure

This responsibility of self to abstain from
You I find subtly impossible—perhaps I do
Not yet fully want myself back on 
Dry land breathing fresh sea air

Perhaps I still want to live this lie
But then the only answer is to die.
Copyright © | Year Posted 2022

Poem

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