Eligibility

The day my life went ape ‘chit’ in no more than three-hundred words Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch counts And pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis works wonders When I am asked to write a poem that is either precise or reductionist Thus I report from my personal lock down epicentre of home isolation With free advice to conquer the gremlins of free speech and contagion Firstly pretend you are German because one compound nouns fills a page Then rediscover hyphenation and have a match with auto-correct settings Or pick up the challenge and find those scrabble pieces under the couch Next to valuable coins a few toe-nails or belly-ring to gather your thoughts Pasta shapes with letters and letterpress cookies are essential food items You will find them on shelves in shops where the loo roll had previously been On that delicate matter it might be worthwhile to consider what colloquy You can fit on a single ply sheet used sparingly on both sides in dire need Word counts are useful to pass the twenty seconds it takes to wash hands But remember to spell hyphenation-control-centre with a dash of content Consider that a pencil is sharp on one end if you poke fun on the toilet My wife still bears a charcoal tattoo from when a soft roll in satin sheets Gifted an indelible reminder that pleasure and pain work hand in hand A carefully calligraphed dot to dot surely trumps auto-generated novels Unwrap fortune cookies and proof read for the true meaning of spells Whatever tickles your fanny until cohabitational glow fades in the face Of adversity calling for regaining control over figures of speechlessness Blank page …? One last piece of counsel and guidance for a true minimalist poet or scribe ‘I love you’ works well all you have to do is repeat one-hundred times 28th March 2020 Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogochis the name of a small town in the North of Wales pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis lurks in the shadow of corona Poem written for Caren Krutsinger's contest 'The day my life went whacko' Word count exactly three hundred words