Duplex

We had the sun We had the sun when our love was brand new When each day was a dream, when you cherished the view Then came the rain, when my tears filled the sky When you pulled back your heart, when you whispered goodbye There was no moon, when the darkness had died When there were no more stars, when the heavens had cried Where is the sky when I can’t seem to see As my heart breaks apart because you’re not with me 12/06/16 Written for the Duplex poetry contest Sponsored by Jan Allison Syllable count checked on Soup's syllable counter

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Sandra Haight

Date: 12/11/2016 8:01:00 PM

A full story made up of two-syllable lines that flow so beautifully, Chris! Congrats on your fine placement. Sandra

Chris Green
Date: 12/12/2016 8:37:00 AM

Thanks so very much Sandra, I am so glad you liked it.

Just James

Date: 12/11/2016 11:17:00 AM

great flow indeed! well done Chris

Chris Green
Date: 12/12/2016 8:36:00 AM

Thanks so very much James

Alexis Y.

Date: 12/11/2016 5:00:00 AM

Hi Chris, I knew I would find you on the winning list! Congratulations on your win. It was well deserved: -) Alexis

Chris Green
Date: 12/12/2016 8:36:00 AM

Thanks so very much my sweet friend. I appreciate your kind words.

Darren White

Date: 12/10/2016 11:57:00 PM

I am singing indeed, coming back to you with congratulations :)

Chris Green
Date: 12/12/2016 8:36:00 AM

Thanks so very much Darren. Feel free to stop by and sing anytime. :)

Agnes Krampe

Date: 12/10/2016 7:55:00 PM

Congrats on your win, Chris. I love how you make the poem flow so that one does not even notice the two syllable-per-line format.

Chris Green
Date: 12/12/2016 8:35:00 AM

Thanks so very much Agnes. I am thrilled it touched you that way. It wasn't easy to write, I am happy you enjoyed it

Jan Allison

Date: 12/10/2016 6:21:00 PM

Such a beautiful flow to your poem :-) I wasn't surprised to see your name on this particular poem Chris:-) many congrats:-) hugs Jan xx

Chris Green
Date: 12/12/2016 8:35:00 AM

Thanks so very much Jan. I am happy you liked it.

John Hamilton

Date: 12/7/2016 9:37:00 AM

Soo good Chris, should do well in the contest.

Chris Green
Date: 12/7/2016 9:52:00 AM

Thanks so much John. I don't know about that, I have read a few today that have just blown me away. But I appreciate you saying so.

Charmaine Chircop

Date: 12/7/2016 6:02:00 AM

Heartwrenching exceptional sad poem..of absence..longing and goodbye.A fave.

Chris Green
Date: 12/7/2016 9:51:00 AM

Thank you so very much my sweet friend. I appreciate your kindness always.

Paloma P

Date: 12/7/2016 4:33:00 AM

What a great tempo, bittersweet never sounded so good. Good luck Chris.

Chris Green
Date: 12/7/2016 9:51:00 AM

Thanks so very much Paloma. I am happy you liked this one.

Darren White

Date: 12/7/2016 1:14:00 AM

Wonderful Chris, it reads like a song! Good luck in the contest :)

Chris Green
Date: 12/7/2016 9:50:00 AM

Thanks so very much Darren. Hey feel free to sing along if you like. :)

Deborah Burch

Date: 12/6/2016 9:53:00 PM

Nicely done Chris! Great flow! Best wishes in the contest. Big Hugggs. Cap'n Deb

Chris Green
Date: 12/7/2016 9:50:00 AM

Thanks so very much Cap'n Deb. I am happy you liked this one.

Freddie Robinson Jr.

Date: 12/6/2016 9:01:00 PM

Beautiful poem, Chris. Very moving and filled w/such emotion. Has the flow of life issuing from your pen. Such is life, eh. Love this poem a whole lot. Much love to you, bruh.

Chris Green
Date: 12/7/2016 9:49:00 AM

Thanks Freddie, this was a difficult one to write, not so much the theme, I've been there before but the format. I'm glad you enjoyed this one.

Alexis Y.

Date: 12/6/2016 5:34:00 PM

Hi Chris, You have penned a well written piece . I see your unique style through out the piece. It looks like a winner to me. I wish you the best of luck in the contest. A without a doubt seven:-) Alexis

Chris Green
Date: 12/6/2016 5:37:00 PM

Thanks so very much Alexis. I'm not sure about all of that but I am happy you liked it.

Heidi Sands

Date: 12/6/2016 4:43:00 PM

Well written Chris. I can feel the sadness and heartbreak. Good luck in the contest!

Chris Green
Date: 12/6/2016 4:50:00 PM

Thank you so very much my sweet friend. I am happy you liked this.

Gary Smith

Date: 12/6/2016 4:28:00 PM

A wonderful poem Chris, top class. Good luck.

Chris Green
Date: 12/6/2016 4:46:00 PM

Thanks so much Gary.