Dented Cans - a Love Story

driving away slow
   enchanted by metaphors…
        rice pelting our car
   white picket fences ahead
dented cans streaming behind

            05 Jan 2018

    syllable count 5-7-5-7-7
Copyright © | Year Posted 2018

Poem

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Gauthier Avatar
April 19, 2018 at 10:53 PM
David, what a surprise spin on the challenge. I FAVE'd your tanka. Awesome - it's a winner.
Pigeon Tart Avatar
January 14, 2018 at 12:56 PM
Wonderful pen! I love it :)
Allison Avatar
January 13, 2018 at 4:51 PM
what a superb take on dented cans David a superb tanks! many congrats on your win:-) hugs Jan xx
Lawless Avatar
January 13, 2018 at 12:36 PM
David, the final couplet - a perfect depiction of the Ying/Yang of marriage. Thanks for participating in the contest
Horsman Avatar
January 12, 2018 at 9:17 AM
love this, David, the theme and your wonderful words fit the tanka so well.
Dietrich Avatar
January 7, 2018 at 6:45 PM
I love this. I too have been wanting to do mine on the cans behind a honeymoon car but I was going to use etheree form. I hope I can pull it off!!!
May Avatar
January 6, 2018 at 7:21 PM
Great take on the theme David..best wishes
Roper Avatar
January 5, 2018 at 11:26 PM
Love the verse, David, good luck in the contest Hugs Eve
Onclaud Avatar
January 5, 2018 at 9:40 PM
love the surprise in the end; so imaginative, david.. huggs
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