Dangling Participles

Every time something breaks like the pipe in the wall we heard gushing this morning my wife wants to call a repairman because I can’t fix anything except split infinitives and dangling participles and I usually agree but this time I mention the kayaks in the attic and say why don’t we hop in the kayaks open the front door and sail down the street wave to the neighbors cutting their grass planting their peonies worrying about crime and shout best of luck we’re tired of the good life we’re sailing away. Donal Mahoney