Cry For Help!
I can’t believe how much I’ve changed.
The pounds I’ve lost in large range.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this.
Happiness was the only thing I thought I missed.
Looking in the mirror,
What do I see?
I see someone else that doesn’t look like me.
That’s just the way I wanted to be.
To have a new body and face.
To disappear without a trace.
It’s to late,
I can’t stop for the love of grace.
Skipping meals,
Tarring me apart,
It doesn’t compare to what I pay with my heart.
If I die,
I’ll die trying to fit the image I’m needing to be.
Will someone please set me free?
No one knows the damage I’ve done.
Deterioration has already begun.
Purging blood and popping pills.
To fill this void I yern to fill.
This is what its like to lose control,
But it seem I’ve taken a toll.
I don’t want to lose my sole.
No one would understand the problem.
I hold my hands.
No one understands this obsession.
I grieve.
Wanting to be pretty,
Wanting to be perfect,
That’s how it started with me.
Now I can’t break free.
So many times I’ve reached out,
But people turned away filled with doubt.
Living a lie,
Being miss right
Was just a discise.
I’ve given up the fight.
All I wanted was to be loved,
With this finger in my throat I’ve shoved.
I use to be strong,
But now I’m weak.
God help me,
Going back is all I seek.
Copyright © Jeanette Huston | Year Posted 2005
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