Courage To Feel

A mindset of pride, Advances courage, Forming a wall, Blocking emotions like a lineman of love, Many attempt to penetrate, But I, Am an addict, Addicted to denial and letdowns, So I run in fear, Scramble, Praying she is fake, Or he is a dog, An excuse, Because I don’t know if, I can handle an honest man, Or a loyal woman, Because I don’t know if, I am ready, Ready to trust, Ready to commit, Ready to love… While I think on these thoughts, My wall is penetrated, So before I find an answer, I am forced to decide, My decision is a doorway, Do I open myself unto her? Or close up, Protecting myself from him? I tell myself to be brave, But even my bravery is indecisive, She decides for me, As I open up, And we become one, Now I, Am and addict, Addicted to trust and opportunity, Unhealthy is any addiction, As I leave myself vulnerable, Vulnerable to pain, Vulnerable to hurt, Vulnerable to…love, True happiness and joy, Self love and comfort, Who is to decide but I, And her or him? My strategy, In this my life of chess, Is to place my queen of courage in front of all, Courage to love, Courage to trust, But most of all, Courage to feel. FRESH WRITTEN