Consumed by darkness

In the shadows, hides a mind swollen full of pain and emptiness. Dark thoughts consume my soul. I'm sure not to show it, when others are looking. My held high,smiles to hide the horrible feelings I have inside.My heart drowning in despair.Days turn into night's meditation nope not for me, medication yes please.Cant handle my loved ones being taken from me. It's a punishment I do believe when the darkness consumed me.