Constellations in a Notebook: Identity Rendered in Prussian Blue’
When your notebook was placed in my hands,
I waited,
as if opening it too quickly might scatter
whatever quiet lived between its pages.
The first few drawings were like pale constellations,
white lines learning how to exist in the dark,
a vase holding flowers that knew how to bloom,
a self-portrait…
those unmistakable eyes
behind that pair of transparent, rectangular frames…
seeing and being seen at once
And then,
I saw the one I was told was made with me in mind,
as your self-portrait closed its eyes,
the next page opened onto mine,
No other sketches intervened.
Just a sweet, subtle “me before you” message,
like an unspoken continuation.
The Prussian blue ocean like a boundless mirror reflecting the sky,
a vast canvas of infinite dreams.
At the shoreline, stood a lone girl beside a palm tree,
hair unbound…
swaying with the wind as if it had learned freedom
by watching the waves.
Since then, when someone asks me the meaning of my name,
I hesitate,
because how do you fit yourself
into a single word
after being rendered like that?
So I tell them, it means:
The serenity of the sky,
the depth of the ocean and
the divine blue of Lord Krishna.
For, when our eyes meet,
all languages melt into music…
into that one line
“…Jabse Radha Shyam ke nain hue chaar…”
As if some meetings are not accidental,
but recognitions…
coloured carefully,
and remembered forever in blue.
~Nilashree
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