Jslambert Mister Roboto Poet Prose

Chicago Bank Robber In a Wheel Chair

Saw it online-
Chicago headline, it read...
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"FBI says bank robber called the cops to give confession and rolling location."
Apparently a 25 year old disabled man decided to hold up a teller and flee with $850...

Now for the kicker: The crime was committed in a bank inside the RANHURTS Shopping Center and the wheelchair convict was sentenced two and a half years and actually is from WHEELING, Illinois a suburb of the "Windy 2nd City."

Ok, either the guy failed to hear the call of a little girl in the parking lot yelling "Run Forrest Run!" 
Or he flat out forgot his hometown's varsity team cheer "Go WHEELING, Let's Go!"
Because oddly enough, the criminal called 911 on HIMSELF moments after the stickup. He was found by police at the nearest payphone, in his wheelchair, holding the loaded wallet.
Quality convicts come in all shapes and sizes.

 ~You can't make this stuff up. Google it. (November 2003)

Things that make ya' go HMMMMMMM?

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Jslambert Mister Roboto August 4, 2014 at 2:53 AM JAYsmOOve~ I am soo thrilled and shocked you have read and commented on so much of my poetry tonite! THAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAnK you! Can't believe you know this dude! ha

Jay Loveless August 4, 2014 at 12:54 AM Funny write, and yeah you never do know who your talking to. Thats why I try not to give info on where I live and such. There was once a man who had a friend track me down. And then he sent threats to my house. I was 13. I play it safer now then I even did then. If someone gets info from me, I have to really really trust them. Jslambert Mister Roboto August 4, 2014 at 2:55 AM oops. JaySmOOve. I meant to type thank You in this box. I need to put the piece Pipe down....Ku$h ComA!!!! 420

Jslambert Mister Roboto August 2, 2014 at 10:31 AM Awesome you folks are finding out who this is...Goes to show, never know who yir' chattin' with online...be careful. There are several articles about him in the Chicago Tribune, amongst other online newspapers. Hell, I'd flee to Canada too, that is so funny. You guys keep me smiling!

Jan Allison July 30, 2014 at 6:56 PM An incredible tale Mr Roboto... could only happen in the US LOl. Hugs Jan xxx Jslambert Mister Roboto July 30, 2014 at 8:17 PM yes indeed! In the Midwest at that!

Carolyn Devonshire July 29, 2014 at 12:05 PM Dear JS, What an amusing story! Loved your lines about "Run, Forrest, Run!" and "Go Wheeling." Sadly, it may be that this man wanted to go to jail as he knew he'd have food and shelter there. It happens often, but not in the manner described here. Very interesting. Love, Carolyn Jslambert Mister Roboto July 30, 2014 at 8:12 PM Interesting enough, I know this guy....He is a well known Poet who honed his craft while inside prison wall. So, the tale ended up somewhat happy.

Tim Smith July 29, 2014 at 3:54 AM This is amazing.... I live in Chicago and hadn't heard....I'll have to check with some of my police buddies to see if there is anything more to it....cheers Jslambert Mister Roboto July 29, 2014 at 4:28 AM Believe it friend...This story blew my mind...I mean it REALLLY blew my stinkin' mind. It was like hitting the lotto!

Kabuteng P.Ink K. July 29, 2014 at 1:25 AM Well, I think the police deserve to have it easy in catching the bad guys ;) this made me smile, thanks! Stuff like these you sure can't make up, & all those other funnies who practically turn themselves in via their selfies on FB & Instagram, The pros of social media! You know what? It's always a pleasure to read your stuff, hopefully I do get to read more of yours, and thank you for reading mine & leaving inspiring views! I think it is better to keep off TV & news, they cause stress too much. Jslambert Mister Roboto July 29, 2014 at 2:00 AM normally I stay away from humor of this nature...but dang! Stupid is as stupid does, to quote the formerly crippled Forest Gump to Lt. Dan. Maybe that robber should have taken after Forrest and "RUN FORREST RUN"