Can I Be Beautiful Still

It’s 5:00am My life, and what’s to come, and what’s over Expands towards me and recedes I hear voices in the water, Bending, twisting, arguing, Quiet, cutting conversations Debating my form, throwing rocks Pebbles, layering me with mud Algae, with jeans, with orders, Shirts, videos, machines, receipts, recipes I’m heavy with edits and plans Burdened soles of feet on slippery rocks So many piles and mountains of things It gets tricky to see the horizon And to hold myself, to touch me To cradle and to embrace me But I ask to love still, to feel the wind To keep seeing clear with blue eyes Sometimes that’s all I can do Content with what I carry, And wading, for a moment, into warmth 3/10/2018