Berth

She wanted to go back to the place that expelled her- Octopode ink on a birth certificate. Black smoke, not blue, Dark smatter hid from view Pale pink sunrise Baby blue skies... It rained the day she cried, newborn, still womb warm. Instinct to live no option. No yes and no gut feeling reply. She needs to go back to the genesis of needs and wants, the whole body experience takes up space in the air we breathe without a care. Approval sidelined in attachment style ghosts the childlike grab and clutch. Love not cut from cuddle cloth. As years sidled by, she realized this was all it was afterall- her life wrapped up in swaddle soft as spider's silk. Organic web of sticky lies held tricky truths stuck firmly in disguise. It's become time to cut the chords that bind. Engine heart thuds in the hull, Picks up pace, sounds push survival surge, Mindful design is on the move. Doused in drowze, piled up permafrost covers, smothers, preserves, impacts a heart petrified by spider's bite. There is no future being hidden from her own blinded sight. It still rains on and off- cloud cover in between climactic chaos and sometimes normal weather. Patterns of desperate needs uncover pros and cons divide each other. The emptied womb is no longer a warm and welcoming vessel. Gone forever, what's over are leftovers not fit to feed future expansion. She commands her craft to unberth- Driving force a desire to disconnect from dissonance docked in moving goalposts. Truth breaks the trauma bond, false hopes. There's no future in future faking. The present is full of deliberation. It's truly now, or truly never. The past is not on her horizon forever. Posted December 31, 2023.