Awaking From Stupor

Somewhere within me there were seeds I'd planted, lying dormant within fallow fields of another time ~ A Sonnet once started until it lost rhythm and rhyme. For years I'd been chained to shadows that never faded and I'd traded nights without sleep for blurry visions ~ as if wool needed pulling from my nettled eyes. I was not naive. To find the fruits of wisdom, there were mountains of issues I'd need to climb. Through what seemed ages of clinging to what I'd known, I realized my heart had stopped singing and the silence became a ringing in my ears that deafened me. There was no mirth in my laughter, no elation or passion. I sought a way to loosen the ropes that held me captive in the dark. Not a spark of hope could I ignite to survive until I'd end the journey I'd taken. I needed to wake from shadows into the vivid light of life. No longer did I want to be stifled with despair and strife. I desperately sought a way to sleep peacefully, not lost in a vacuous stupor, a maze with no way out. Instead, I'd wake without dread ~ free spirited, not jaded. I had an urgent need to no longer be filled with doubt. Then, it hit me as a jolt, as if cold water splashed my face. Life was not a race to be run, but a liberating experience, an exuberance for living that I would wholeheartedly embrace. I remembered the lulling words I'd once read: "it's not desire per say but the clinging ~ that stifles soul and stops heart from singing enlivening silence sets our soul free ~ vibrant in the now, joyful and carefree"