Avoiding Happy

as happiness avoids me
you leave with her
the one

and you plot
to entreat yourself to friged abandonments

and you still ask
"do i trust you?"
and seem surprised 
when i say no

you pretend sadness 
and sorrow
but you dont understand
you have never known those true feelings
you act like the wounded man
like you need protection
weaving your sunlit 
starry web

you crave her warmth 
as i constantly know
you show the obvious with an obvious grin

and yet i cant help but think
that loyalty will follow her
and love will warn her
in the presence of white marble pillars
i dont know if she loves me
and still i trust he more than myself
i cant stop
unthinkable logical falsehoods 
persuade my mind
of otherwises
and other ties

you lied and cheated
to win her heart
when i failed with sincerity
i dont understand 
i showed her love
and you restorativly remove her stare
Copyright © | Year Posted 2009

Poem

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