As I Rise From Slumber
I rise from slumber
Covered in sweat
Covered in fear
Among my eyes
Unshed tears.
But this isn’t the slumber you would have thought
It is a slumber of my untrimmed beating heart.
I’ve slept so long in the dark with no sun
And finally I’ve seen the light
It’s as bright as the northern stars.
No more screams..
No more tears..
No more fear of being judged here..
My wings I’ve hid for so long
Cramped..
Cramped like my style
Style..
The style of my voice
Finally everything able to soar free
Free..
FREE
WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME I WAS TRULY THIS FREE
NO MORE WILL I HIDE
NO MORE WILL I SLUMBER
TODAY IS THE DAY I CHOOSE TO RISE
Rise..
RISE FROM EVERYONE’S JUDGMENT AND LIES.
That’s it I’m awake
My bones aching
My voice and breath shaking
That treacherous memory of my own heart breaking has caused me enough sleepless nights..
Today I choose to
Fight..fight..FIGHT.
Awake I say get out of bed….it’s time to get to work
Not work as in a job
But work as in my own soul…
No longer will the demons of my past
Control me or my thoughts
They will no longer yank my leash
They will no longer cuff me to ball and chain
Today I choose to break free
I choose me…
No matter what anyone says I will rule the day
Because as I rise from slumber I realize it’s better this way.
I’m the one in charge of my own destiny
No matter how much the sleep paralysis demons may shout
I choose to snuff them out..
Away I shout
Away and never let me see your ugly face
Your somewhat beautiful broken soul
I know it’s not your fault that you judge me so..
So as I walk and I groan my body aching from weight
I rush to the bathroom to see my fate
My fate I’ve finally decided,so I turn the faucet on and splash water upon my face…
And then I look in the mirror and all I see is you…
My dream state self my most authentic personal being…
It’s no wonder what I have screamed waking up…
I’ve risen from slumber and decided today was enough..
Today I play the game my way
Today the universe will bow down to my will
I’m done being the black sheep of this cruel society
I’m gonna let my freak flag fly and overthrow the norm
Through my words through my song through my voice
I will bang my own drum
No longer will the past haunt me so
I will rise from my slumber
A suitable soul.
So I wipe my tears
I clear the mirror
I stumble back to my bed
I decided to finally rest my head with a smile on my face
I know now that no matter what happens
I am free
I am finally free to be my most authentic me.
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