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Anyone Who Wants To Fight Me All the Time

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"Soon I will know who I am." --Borges

Anyone who wants to fight me all the time committee meetings, board meetings. Facing death was how they knew they were alive or was it more about allocating resources like yr Dad said. It's hard to step outside what yr DNA tells you to do. Nice ****. Family farm, fight club. It's all one yet distinctions are what separates the librarian, reflective man, from the road and bridge crew. That's a class statement. Us guys love our children and will, circumstances dictating, fight for you. * * * Anyone who wants to fight me all the time is more important to me than my wife. But there is no one left to fight and no one knows me and I know no one well. That's good, there is more space between people than I'd ever dared to hope. I'm confused. Meditator or gunfighter. Either could come to know himself, flat abs, clear sight with patience and discipline. What's this: know yourself? Once yr knee or neck is smashed there's no getting up to fight. * * * Anyone who wants to fight me all the time will grow old alone once I'm in the ground. He will live with the question what was our purpose? He was managed by the molecules we're made of, proteins, enzymes, amino acids, DNA. **** DNA. I'd rather be a rock. But the rock is subject to its elements. Thus, the periodic table and particle physics, meiosis and mitosis and yes, democracy and self-governance, all the colors of anthropology and ecology, windmills and sundials, fission and fusion for evil and light and the devil who exists to carry the load when we misbehave and fight among ourselves. * * * Anyone who wants to fight me all the time is how I know who I am. Because the truth is always changing, depending on the meeting. What's good. Service to others is a safe bet. That service may take many forms: fighting, meeting, teaching, making. The fighting may be part of holding community together. Limited scope, defensive posture. How broadly we define community says everything. So, we come to Mexico, a violent border and an unhappy history. Or Gaza and Israel. Or Russia and just about everybody. How can a people become a nation without resorting to violence or incurring violent reaction? Does it matter? Accept violence like any EMT and devote yourself to what, beauty? Why do I write about violence, I've almost never had to fight. * * * Anyone who wants to fight me all the time is nothing compared to the ocean which can take your children any time. The Nazis or janjaweed. In peace we have our meetings. When violence comes to the neighborhood the hierarchy of communicants will hold or fold it is then the peace work proves relevant. Hold your clod of land. Give way to the waves. All I do not know. I admire the writer who penetrates the unknown by describing that which is not himself. His enemy, anyone who wants to fight him all the time helps him live outside himself.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2015




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Book: Shattered Sighs