Susan Benjamin | + Follow Poet |
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Abuse

Why do the birds insist on 
chirping
When the dark cloud above 
my head
Soaks me with all the 
emotions
That have remained bottled up 
for years
Until he came into the 
picture..

Roses and orchids 
Scented candles
Bath salts and all
He treated me good..

I remember the times when 
Halo was the glow i saw above 
his head
His saintly ways fast enough
To catch my tears before they 
trickled down
Bending over backwards
To protect this poetic shrine 
I called my heart

Writing on my walls as best as 
i could
I made pages from 
Memories
Spray painted my joy on brick 
walled canvases 
Pouring out my love from 
buckets of comfortable 
feelings

But the uncomfortability of a 
comfortable situation started 
When i saw daddy's face in his 
face
Fire breathing 
Huffing and puffing
Saying **** like
" I made you, so i can break 
you"

Broke me he did..
Skulls bashing on windows
Cracking bones
Like a boxing ring
And i was on the other side of 
Ali's fists
Blue and blacking
My flesh
Making unhappy rainbows on 
my cheeks..

The uncomfortability of a 
comfortable situation was..

Tearing my heart out
Like pages from an old 
newspaper
I gues i was old news..
A story told too many times to 
mean **** nomore
A statistic of a problem the 
nation talks about once in 
every year
An anniversary of perpetual 
pain to the broken hearted..

Feeling unloved like a worn 
out primary school uniform
I feel the emotions and 
memories from back then
Twisting and turning 
Reaching out of my soul 
Yearning to break out nd 
break me..

Break me like daddy broke 
mommy
With his big bad hand
The sounds of breaking 
glasses
Morphing itself into a lullaby
Pushing me to a corner in my 
room where i rocked back and 
forth
Waiting for the "bad dream"
To end..

Sorries are always forgotten 
when a 'Bells' starts ringing
And Labels turn Black
Intoxicated or not
The match never ends..

Walking on eggshells, 
Stagnant like words unspoken

I run to these pages
Inking them with the words 
unsaid
The cries unheard
It dont stop the pain
But it does make the clouds 
above my head
Stop the rain ...

Copyright © Susan Benjamin | Year Posted 2014

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