Absolute Silence
For once, I want to come home and rest:
It felt like my heart's beating out of my chest.
The work week was grueling, that's for sure:
Absolute silence is my only cure.
Instead of expecting peace and quiet,
I'm hearing a lot of noise and riots.
Some people don't have any decency left;
They play their music till they're almost deaf.
It gets worse on the 4th of July;
After 1 a.m., the fireworks still fly.
And don't get me started on people with phones:
The voices are louder than their ringtones.
Construction jackhammer, dogs barking,
People arguing over double parking:
Motorcycle engines, car and truck horns;
Nothing is worse than a tired man scorned.
I can't deal with this racket anymore!
So I bought a megaphone from the $10 store.
I began to use it and here's what I said:
"Listen up, y'all! I'm lying in my bed.
You're giving me a headache from the noises you make,
And that is a very costly mistake.
There'll be consequences if I hear another peep:
Now shut up and let me get some sleep!"
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