A Visit By the Mother-In-Law

A Visit by the Mother-in-Law

By Elton Camp

My mother-in-law lives in another state
Her annual visits I most intensely hate
For her daughter, I wasn’t good enough
So, from the old crone I get lots of guff

“To Mother you better be nicer this time.
She will regret calling you a ball of slime.”
Unless wife I obey and welcome the grouch,
Then for two weeks, I’ll sleep on the couch

So I did everything that my wife had asked
My welcome of Mom Bea was unsurpassed
I had a vase of flowers waiting in her room
And I was careful as to how dress and groom

I made sure the yard was all mowed and neat
And practiced the best way our guest to greet
Nothing at all must go wrong on this trip
I was determined not to make a single slip

“Come in, Mother Bea, and stay a long while.
Your visits are welcome and make me smile.”
But I will admit that it almost made me gag
To have to talk so sweet to that mean old hag

“Son, I am so glad to learn you feel that way.
I feel ashamed and don’t know what to say.”
I told her that the problems we had had before
I’d see that they never will happen any more

Our four-year-old son from his room came out
To see just what all the friendly talk was about
“Hello there you sweet little dear, Gram is here.
Into this dismal home you do bring such cheer.”

Joey then ran over and climbed up into her lap
Around him, Mother Bea her arms did wrap
Our son looked at me and so loudly he calls
“You’re right, Dad, she smells like mothballs.”
Copyright © | Year Posted 2010

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Camp Avatar
December 9, 2010 at 9:37 AM
To Carolyn: Thanks for being such a regular reader and for taking time to comment. Most of my poems are based at least loosely on personal experience, but not this one. I never had the opportunity to know my mother-in-law, but think we would have got along well. Elton
Devonshire Avatar
December 9, 2010 at 9:34 AM
Oh, dear Lord, your son gave away your secret! I didn't know where this was headed, Elton but truly hung on every word. I remember thinking one of my own grandmothers had a mothball-like scent and her attitude wasn't very pleasant either. LOL Very funny, my friend. Keep Joey in the bedroom next time and maybe you'll be able to patch things up with your mother in law. Have you seen Larry Belt's collection of poetry about his mother in law? He'd like this as much as I do! Love, Carolyn
Camp Avatar
December 9, 2010 at 9:34 AM
Thanks Liz, I was a bit hesitant to post this one out of fear that it might offend mothers-in-law out there. It is imagination only. I never had the opportunity to know my mother-in-law. Elton
Walsh Avatar
December 9, 2010 at 9:13 AM
I really enjoyed this - Liz
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