A Taxpayer Speaks

A TAXPAYER SPEAKS Years ago when filing tax forms reared its proliferating death’s head I cursed, perspired, and thought about moving to a foreign homestead As a low-income taxpayer I felt too unimportant to hire an accountant So I filed and filed for years, at all times a very incompetent combatant Penalties-plus-interest plagued me and I could not raise a skilled defense Prolonged tax failures destroyed my sense of self-confidence It was past time to explore options to end to all this tax nonsense Waking to a new day I jumped out of bed at the crack of dawn And scoured the yellow pages for a tax advocate to call upon After detailing my sad tax history they agreed to take my case head-on My tax life was now covered by tax experts with knowledge and brawn My “Tax-Saviors” wasted no time plunging into battle early-on Past tax filings were messy, chaotic, confusing and jumbled Yet they contended, defended, persevered and never crumbled. I have learned that tax advocate giants who defend vulnerable taxpayers Give Tax Dictators headaches for they are tougher and tenacious tax players . A tribute is due these Tax Defenders who aid us so nobly And recalling the moving inscription on our Statue of Liberty (An Emma Lazarus 1883 poem composed in New York City) My tribute follows and is submitted very humbly (please forgive the “re-phrasing” substituted for clarity): Give us your tired, your poor, your tax-ignorant masses, Yearning to breathe free who have no one to file their taxes Oh, send these huddled and tortured masses, (Who feel so inept and like derisory asses) To Tax Saviors who lay waste to all kinds of tax matters Rescuing taxpayers dwelling in indecision and tax-law tatters These Tax-Saviors welcome all with an open-door policy And any taxpayer who makes the journey Will at last enjoy fear-free tax filing yearly.” (However, new tax laws are being drafted by devious Tax Dictators Who derive joy from harassing captive taxpaying participators!)