A Tale of Two Cousins

Luke* and Frank* were my cousins from two of my father’s sisters. Luke and Frank lived in the same city, and I joined them for an important family event. I had not seen nor spoken to either of them for more than 40 years. When I arrived, I telephoned Luke. Luke was a year older than me and having grown up together, we were well acquainted with each other. Luke and his family moved 2000 miles away when I was 13. Frank and I knew each other as young kids but were not well acquainted. When I saw them again after 40 years, their response to me was a vast story in contrast. I have shared this story with other members of the family. Where appropriate, I have not revealed their identity, desiring not to be offensive in any way. Upon arriving in their city, I spoke with Luke over the phone. I was excited in my voice tone and very delighted to finally renew our acquaintances. However, I was stunningly surprised by the response from Luke on the other end. I was quickly mistaken to think that I would at least be warmly welcomed with a sense of anticipation of him seeing me again. Instead, Luke was rather indifferent, tamed, and subdued. His tone was so disconnected from mine that I was forced to calm my emotions toward him. It felt so very awkward to me. On the occasion of the event with everyone gathered, Frank was among the crowd and not at all recognizable by me. As kids, we saw each other only occasionally when my father took us to visit them several miles away. Nevertheless, Frank walked straight up to me, and in spite of the years, my full beard, and eyeglasses, he said, “Hi Michael!” I was 55 years of age, and could not have been more than 10 or 12 when we last saw each other. Although a little disappointed, I was really okay. And I would never tell Luke how he made me feel. Frank was the kind of guy that made up for guys like Luke. But “Not all cousins are created equal”, is what I wanted to say. 02182016PS *True story; Names have been changed