A Note From An Octopus

Dear humans, I am an octopus and I’m unhappy with how you humans think you’re so great. You might say I have a bone to pick with you… which would be true if I weren’t an invertebrate. I want you to know I am more than just a cephalopod with 8 tentacles who spits out a little ink for I too have a brain, in fact with nine of them… and I am much smarter than you think I have learned to use different tools and I solve problems too and what if all those times you think you’re watching me… I’ve been watching you. You humans think with your one heart you’re as loving as can be… Well think again mere humans…for every octopus has three. So the next time you’re feeling superior… the next time you think that you’re so great remember…most animals in the world live in the ocean… and most, like me, are invertebrates. Please do not lament these facts… do not become a sourpuss… I’m sure you have some good qualities too… Sincerely, The Octopus P. S. I know you’re proud of your ability to write… and to be fair I think that’s great but in the time it takes you to write one letter… I’ve already written eight!