A Monster Underneath My Bed

If there's a monster underneath my bed, I hope it's not too scary. I hope that he...or she, has scales, instead of being hairy: cuz mommy says I always sneeze, around the birds and bumblebees, when running after Mac and Cheese, because I have these aluhgeez; so, yeah...please don't be hairy, please. If ever I should think it's there, I'll cover up my head and hair, and hope it doesn't like to stare, cuz mommy says that's rude: show manners, not your additude. And I hope it doesn't think I'm picky, if I touch its nose and say it's sticky, cuz...cuz I would -yawns- cuz I would think...that's kinda creepy. -rubs eye- I guess I'm getting kinda sleepy. BUT, umm, if it's a lady under there, I hope she has a lotta hair, because my little sister, Clair, is really good at taking care of dolls. Besides, I think it's fair that older brothers oughta share-- ...weeeeell, sometimes. But if the monster is a guy, I really hope that he can fly, cuz daddy drives an airuhplane, but he has to drive it in the sky: so I'd hop aboard my monster's back and together we would tell him "Hi"! And then we'd--Oh! Well, there's my mommy's knock again. I guess I'll see you later then, my best imaginary friend. But could you tell the he or she that's lying somewhere under me, that if it heard the things I said, to not sleep underneath my bed, because ...that's kinda creepy.