A Hearty Choke

She awakes each day to it. She ate it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner She bathed in it. She let it wrap it's postulating arms around her. She made love to it. She lovingly cursed it, and then realized it's tangible effects on her. She'll forever remember the start of it. It was at the beginning of her bastardly life, but then it disappeared for a short period of time when she was under the nurturing care of her grandmother. It reappeared with her mother and was a constant companion down the languishing road of poverty, devastation, rape, and abuse. It came with benefits; a craving for perfection, control, and paranoia. There was those who tried to take it from her, offering her love and encouragement, but she love only it. Even a fleeting moment without it, she felt broken . There was those who tried to name it and handle it, but she knew their falseness and clung tighter to it. She knew that it dined on her conscious and subconscious, yet she revel with the delight of it. She was lost inside, it was a hearty choke, but she just didn't care. Written 12-11-06 copyrighted 2006