Az Si Poet Free verse

A Girl in the Margins

I looked at her pictures ,.
looking up at the ceiling... asked myself 
Wasn't supposed to feel this...it is
Just another smile, right? Then
Why won't my heart shut up?
I care about her, .
Checked if she's online,
thought about her for a sec
checked on the last text she sent
Since when did I start waiting on texts?
Since when did silence started carrying a name?
I'm in love with her, .
Didn't mean to fall.
But she's in every poem now,
Even the ones I never wrote..

Archive May'25 

While writing this, I remember feeling trapped between shock and surrender. As though I had caught myself committing small acts of devotion without permission. Returning to old messages. Staring too long at photographs. Inventing reasons to check whether someone was there. Oh This appears harmless in isolation but, when gathered together, it's not too healthy. Yk there is a strange horror in realizing that someone has become important to you. The moment a feeling stops asking for entry cz it has already moved in. Like finding a candle burning in an abandoned room and realizing someone has been living there much longer than you knew.

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