A Funny Thing Happened On the Way To Heaven

A funny thing happened on the way to heaven. Of course I had been told about the Pearly Gates. I had lived my life until eighty and seven, And had always been aware of the choice of fates. My death had been uneventful as those things go - The funeral pleasant, the right amount of tears Fell from the downcast eyes of those who loved me so. My soul smiled a smile as I recalled all those years. The transition was seamless as I used to say. They laid my remains in a very simple grave As my soul felt relieved and headed on its way. I walked a worn path and never turned back to wave. In short order I came upon two golden poles That marked the main entrance to the heavenly zones. Outside to the left stood about a million souls - To the right rose a mountain of their own smart phones. They carried signs saying."Even Hell has cell towers!" And,"Eternity is long - we demand cell phones." They gave no hint they understood God's powers, And were concentrating on hearing their bell tones. So there they were, Saints in an unending protest As I walked on past thinking of the Golden Rule. I did not judge them as maybe they did know best - But I thanked the Lord that he had made me "old school." 6-26-18 For contest A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To _____, for Robert Haigh