A Dedication To Myself

There is a poetry contest on a web site to write your own dedication A difficult task for a humble man; good thing I am not him. They will line up by the door, I am sure, thousands by the score, And I realize it will be televised for a million viewers more. "We've come today", the president will say, "To honor Joseph Flach Who has accomplished so many things, but none I can think of as a matter of fact. But he must be loved by all of you and be someone that you revere, Otherwise I must ask why else have we all gathered here? "My notes are thin, and I never knew him, so someone please help me out, Any of you amongst this slew, if you know something just give a shout. Surely there's a reason for this dedication, he must have done some kind of thing." They all look around, not making a sound, the silence is deafening. "I once saw him juggle, at least three balls for about 10 or 15 tosses." "He once played in a tennis tournament and he had the most losses." "I read a poem that he once wrote and a few of the words made sense." "He once spoke up at a town hall with a rip in the back of his pants." Not a pretty sight and quite a fright to see them all get up and go, Wondering why they were scammed to come to a dedication for some average Joe. I heard them mumbling and on my last name stumbling, "Just who is this guy named Flach?" Lucky for me, in reality, I've got years to try to win them back.