A Ballade of Beseeching

As I was washing the dishes last week I looked outside my windowpane. Snow-filled land and winter bleak, I see a moose—how inane! Thinking I must be going insane, Or perhaps something of a retard, I asked many but the answer was the same Please get the moose out of my yard One day within that crazy week My husband was working in the plains He went to a bush to take a leak And there, staring, it was again! He ran through the village through gasps of fright he just couldn’t retain Now my hubbie is a lunatic, paranoid and scarred With no fortune to his name! Please get the moose out of my yard Living here with seven babes on a meadow leek Trying to keep sane All the neighbors think me a freak As I try to reassure and explain And STILL the blasted animal remains Keeping me absorbedly on-guard He even trampled my great dane into grain! Please get the moose out of my yard Dear Prince, soon King so to speak I beseech you with utmost regard If it so pleases I will throw you a daughter for queen Just please—PLEASE get the moose out of my yard!