| Lyrics |
When I was younger, just a bad little kid,my mama noticed funny things I did,like shootin' puppies with a B B gun.I'd poison guppies, and when I was done
I'd find a pussycat and bash in its head.
That's when my mama said (
What did she say?),she said, "
My boy, I think somedayyou'll find a way to make your natural tendencies pay.
You'll be a dentist. You have a talent for causin' things pain.
Son, be a dentist. People will pay you to be inhumane.
Your temp'rament's wrong for the priesthoodand teaching would suit you still less.
Son, be a dentist. You'll be a success.(
Here he is, folks: the leader of the plaque!
Watch him suck up that gas! Oh, my god!
He's a dentist and he'll never ever be any good.
Who wants their teeth done by the Marquis de Sade?
Oh that hurts! I'm not numb!)
Oh, shut up. Open wide. here I come!I am your dentist (goodness gracious!),and I enjoy the career that I picked. (
Love it.)I am your dentist (fitting braces),and I get off on the pain I inflict. (
Really love it.)I thrill when I drill a bicuspid.
It's swell though they tell me I'm maladjusted.
And though it may cause my patients distress,somewhere, somewhere in heaven above me
I know, I know, that my mama's proud of me (
Oh, mama.)'cause I'm a dentist and a success.
Say ah! (
Ah!) Say ah! (
Ah!) Say ah! (
Ah!) Now spit.
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