Famous Short Funny Poems

Famous Short Funny Poems. Short Funny Poetry by Famous Poets. A collection of the all-time best Funny short poems

---

by Tupac Shakur

Did you hear about the rose that grew
from a crack in the concrete?
Proving nature's law is wrong it
learned to walk with out having feet.

Funny it seems, but by keeping it's dreams,
it learned to breathe fresh air.

Long live the rose that grew from concrete
when no one else ever cared.
 

---

by Muhammad Ali

Now you see me, now you don't. 
George thinks he will, but I know he won't

---

by Shel Silverstein

 Once I spoke the language of the flowers,
Once I understood each word the caterpillar said,
Once I smiled in secret at the gossip of the starlings,
And shared a conversation with the housefly
in my bed.

Once I heard and answered all the questions
of the crickets,
And joined the crying of each falling dying
flake of snow,
Once I spoke the language of the flowers.
 .
 .
 .

How did it go?
How did it go?

---

by Muhammad Ali

There live a great man named Joe
who was belittled by a loudmouth foe.
While his rival would taunt and tease
Joe silently bore the stings.
And then fought like gladiator in the ring.

---

by Shel Silverstein

 I opened my eyes
And looked up at the rain,
And it dripped in my head
And flowed into my brain,
And all that I hear as I lie in my bed
Is the slishity-slosh of the rain in my head.


I step very softly,
I walk very slow,
I can't do a handstand--
I might overflow,
So pardon the wild crazy thing I just said--
I'm just not the same since there's rain in my head.

---

by Shel Silverstein

 There's a Polar Bear
In our Frigidaire--
He likes it 'cause it's cold in there.

With his seat in the meat
And his face in the fish
And his big hairy paws
In the buttery dish,
He's nibbling the noodles,
He's munching the rice,
He's slurping the soda,
He's licking the ice.

And he lets out a roar
If you open the door.

And it gives me a scare
To know he's in there--
That Polary Bear
In our Fridgitydaire.

---

by Shel Silverstein

 I am writing these poems
From inside a lion,
And it's rather dark in here.

So please excuse the handwriting
Which may not be too clear.

But this afternoon by the lion's cage
I'm afraid I got too near.

And I'm writing these lines
From inside a lion,
And it's rather dark in here.

---

by Shel Silverstein

 Said the little boy, "Sometimes I drop my spoon.
"
Said the old man, "I do that too.
"
The little boy whispered, "I wet my pants.
"
"I do that too," laughed the little old man.

Said the little boy, "I often cry.
"
The old man nodded, "So do I.
"
"But worst of all," said the boy, "it seems
Grown-ups don't pay attention to me.
"
And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.

"I know what you mean," said the little old man.

---

by Shel Silverstein

 Birds are flyin' south for winter.

Here's the Weird-Bird headin' north,
Wings a-flappin', beak a-chatterin',
Cold head bobbin' back 'n' forth.

He says, "It's not that I like ice
Or freezin' winds and snowy ground.

It's just sometimes it's kind of nice
To be the only bird in town.
"

---

by Muhammad Ali

My face is so pretty; you don't see a scar, 
Which proves I'm the king of the ring by far.

---

by Shel Silverstein

 Oh, I'm being eaten
By a boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor,
And I don't like it--one bit.

Well, what do you know?
It's nibblin' my toe.

Oh, gee,
It's up to my knee.

Oh my,
It's up to my thigh.

Oh, fiddle,
It's up to my middle.

Oh, heck,
It's up to my neck.

Oh, dread,
It's upmmmmmmmmmmffffffffff .
 .
 .

---

by Shel Silverstein

 GOD says to me with a kind 
of smile, "Hey how would you like 
to be God awhile And steer the world?"
"Okay," says I, "I'll give it a try.


Where do I set?
How much do I get?
What time is lunch?
When can I quit?"

"Gimme back that wheel," says GOD.

"I don't think you're quite ready YET.
"

---

by Shel Silverstein

 Tell me who can
Catch a toucan?
Lou can.


Just how few can
Ride the toucan?
Two can.


What kind of goo can
Stick you to the toucan?
Glue can.


Who can write some
More about the toucan?
You can!

---

by Shel Silverstein

 Knock knock!
Who's there?
Me!
Me who?

That's right!
What's right?
Meehoo!
That's what I want to know!

What's what you want to know?
Me, WHO?
Yes, exactly!
Exactly what?
Yes, I have an Exactlywatt on a chain!

Exactly what on a chain?
Yes!
Yes what?
No, Exactlywatt!

That's what I want to know!
I told you - Exactlywatt!
Exactly WHAT?
Yes!
Yes what?

Yes, it's with me!
What's with you?
Exactlywatt - that's what's with me.

Me who?
Yes!

GO AWAY!

Knock knock.
.
.

---

by Shel Silverstein

 "A genuine anteater,"
The pet man told me dad.

Turned out, it was an aunt eater,
And now my uncle's mad!

---

by Edward Lear

E
  was an elephant,
Stately and wise:
He had tusks and a trunk,
And two queer little eyes.
 
e
 
Oh, what funny small eyes!

---

by Gelett Burgess

 The meanest trick I ever knew
Was one I know you never do.

I saw a Goop once try to do it,
And there was nothing funny to it.

He pulled a chair from under me
As I was sitting down; but he
Was sent to bed, and rightly, too.

It was a horrid thing to do!

---

by Edward Lear

A
  was an ape,
Who stole some white tape,
And tied up his toes
In four beautiful bows.
 
 
a!
 
Funny old Ape!

---

by Emily Dickinson

 Funny -- to be a Century --
And see the People -- going by --
I -- should die of the Oddity --
But then -- I'm not so staid -- as He --

He keeps His Secrets safely -- very --
Were He to tell -- extremely sorry
This Bashful Globe of Ours would be --
So dainty of Publicity --

---

by Edward Lear

There was an Old Man of Moldavia,
Who had the most curious behavior;
For while he was able, he slept on a table,
That funny Old Man of Moldavia.
 

---

by Edward Lear

M
  was a man,
Who walked round and round;
And he wore a long coat
That came down to the ground.
 
 
m!
 
Funny old Man!

---