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Best Famous Damns Poems

Here is a collection of the all-time best famous Damns poems. This is a select list of the best famous Damns poetry. Reading, writing, and enjoying famous Damns poetry (as well as classical and contemporary poems) is a great past time. These top poems are the best examples of damns poems.

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Written by Thomas Moore | Create an image from this poem

An Argument

 I've oft been told by learned friars,
That wishing and the crime are one,
And Heaven punishes desires
As much as if the deed were done.

If wishing damns us, you and I
Are damned to all our heart's content;
Come, then, at least we may enjoy
Some pleasure for our punishment!


Written by Jonathan Swift | Create an image from this poem

A Description of a City Shower

 Careful Observers may fortel the Hour 
(By sure Prognosticks) when to dread a Show'r: 
While Rain depends, the pensive Cat gives o'er 
Her Frolicks, and pursues her Tail no more. 
Returning Home at Night, you'll find the Sink 
Strike your offended Sense with double Stink. 
If you be wise, then go not far to Dine, 
You spend in Coach-hire more than save in Wine. 
A coming Show'r your shooting Corns presage, 
Old Aches throb, your hollow Tooth will rage. 
Sauntring in Coffee-house is Dulman seen; 
He damns the Climate, and complains of Spleen.

Mean while the South rising with dabbled Wings, 
A Sable Cloud a-thwart the Welkin flings, 
That swill'd more Liquor than it could contain, 
And like a Drunkard gives it up again. 
Brisk Susan whips her Linen from the Rope, 
While the first drizzling Show'r is born aslope, 
Such is that Sprinkling which some careless Quean 
Flirts on you from her Mop, but not so clean. 
You fly, invoke the Gods; then turning, stop 
To rail; she singing, still whirls on her Mop. 
Not yet, the Dust had shun'd th'unequal Strife, 
But aided by the Wind, fought still for Life; 
And wafted with its Foe by violent Gust, 
'Twas doubtful which was Rain, and which was Dust. 
Ah! where must needy Poet seek for Aid, 
When Dust and Rain at once his Coat invade; 
Sole Coat, where Dust cemented by the Rain, 
Erects the Nap, and leaves a cloudy Stain.

Now in contiguous Drops the Flood comes down, 
Threat'ning with Deloge this Devoted Town. 
To Shops in Crouds the dagled Females fly, 
Pretend to cheapen Goods, but nothing buy. 
The Templer spruce, while ev'ry Spout's a-broach, 
Stays till 'tis fair, yet seems to call a Coach. 
The tuck'd-up Sempstress walks with hasty Strides, 
While Streams run down her oil'd Umbrella's Sides. 
Here various Kinds by various Fortunes led, 
Commence Acquaintance underneath a Shed. 
Triumphant Tories, and desponding Whigs, 
Forget their Fewds, and join to save their Wigs. 
Box'd in a Chair the Beau impatient sits, 
While Spouts run clatt'ring o'er the Roof by Fits; 
And ever and anon with frightful Din 
The Leather sounds, he trembles from within. 
So when Troy Chair-men bore the Wooden Steed, 
Pregnant with Greeks, impatient to be freed, 
(Those Bully Greeks, who, as the Moderns do, 
Instead of paying Chair-men, run them thro'.) 
Laoco'n struck the Outside with his Spear, 
And each imprison'd Hero quak'd for Fear.

Now from all Parts the swelling Kennels flow, 
And bear their Trophies with them as they go: 
Filth of all Hues and Odours seem to tell 
What Streets they sail'd from, by the Sight and Smell. 
They, as each Torrent drives, with rapid Force 
From Smithfield, or St.Pulchre's shape their Course, 
And in huge Confluent join at Snow-Hill Ridge, 
Fall from the Conduit prone to Holborn-Bridge. 
Sweepings from Butchers Stalls, Dung, Guts, and Blood,
Drown'd Puppies, stinking Sprats, all drench'd in Mud,
Dead Cats and Turnips-Tops come tumbling down the Flood.
Written by Robert William Service | Create an image from this poem

Natures Touch

 In kindergarten classed
 Dislike they knew;
And as the years went past
 It grew and grew;
Until in maidenhood
 Each sought a mate,
Then venom in their mood
 Was almost hate.

The lure of love they learned
 And they were wed;
Yet when they met each turned
 Away a head;
Each went her waspish way
 With muted damns--
Until they met one day
 With baby prams.

Then lo! Away was swept
 The scorn of years;
Hands clasped they almost wept
 With gentle tears.
Forgetting hateful days,
 All mother mild,
Each took with tender praise
 The other's child.

And now they talk of milk,
 Of diapers and such;
Of baby bosoms silk
 And tender to the touch.
A gemlike girl and boy,--
 With hope unsaid,
Each thinks with mother joy:
 'May these two wed!'
Written by Robert Herrick | Create an image from this poem

Litany to the Holy Spirit

 IN the hour of my distress, 
When temptations me oppress, 
And when I my sins confess, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When I lie within my bed, 
Sick in heart and sick in head, 
And with doubts discomforted, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When the house doth sigh and weep, 
And the world is drown'd in sleep, 
Yet mine eyes the watch do keep, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When the passing bell doth toll, 
And the Furies in a shoal 
Come to fright a parting soul, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When the tapers now burn blue, 
And the comforters are few, 
And that number more than true, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When the priest his last hath pray'd, 
And I nod to what is said, 
'Cause my speech is now decay'd, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When, God knows, I'm toss'd about 
Either with despair or doubt; 
Yet before the glass be out, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When the tempter me pursu'th 
With the sins of all my youth, 
And half damns me with untruth, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When the flames and hellish cries 
Fright mine ears and fright mine eyes, 
And all terrors me surprise, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me! 

When the Judgment is reveal'd, 
And that open'd which was seal'd, 
When to Thee I have appeal'd, 
 Sweet Spirit, comfort me!
Written by Robert Herrick | Create an image from this poem

His Litany to the Holy Spirit

 In the hour of my distress, 
When temptations me oppress, 
And when I my sins confess, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When I lie within my bed, 
Sick in heart, and sick in head, 
And with doubts discomforted, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When the house doth sigh and weep, 
And the world is drown'd in sleep, 
Yet mine eyes the watch do keep, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

Whe the artless doctor sees 
No one hope but of his fees, 
And his skill runs on the lees,
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When his potion and his pill, 
Has or none or little skill, 
Meet for nothing, but to kill, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When the passing-bell doth toll, 
And the Furies in a shoal 
Come to fright a parting soul, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When the tapers now burn blue, 
And the comforters are few, 
And that number more than true, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When the priest his last hath prayed, 
And I nod to what is said, 
'Cause my speech is now decayed, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When (God knows) I'm toss'd about, 
Either with despair or doubt, 
Yet before the glass be out,
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When the Tempter me pursu'th 
With the sins of all my youth, 
And half damns me with untruth, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When the flames and hellish cries 
Fright mine ears and fright mine eyes, 
And all terrors me surprise, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me! 

When the Judgment is revealed, 
And that open'd which was seal'd, 
When to Thee I have appeal'd, 
Sweet Spirit comfort me!


Written by Robert William Service | Create an image from this poem

Bonehead Bill

 I wonder 'oo and wot 'e was,
That 'Un I got so slick.
I couldn't see 'is face because
The night was 'ideous thick.
I just made out among the black
A blinkin' wedge o' white;
Then biff! I guess I got 'im crack --
The man I killed last night.

I wonder if account o' me
Some wench will go unwed,
And 'eaps o' lives will never be,
Because 'e's stark and dead?
Or if 'is missis damns the war,
And by some candle light,
Tow-headed kids are prayin' for
The Fritz I copped last night.

I wonder, 'struth, I wonder why
I 'ad that 'orful dream?
I saw up in the giddy sky
The gates o' God agleam;
I saw the gates o' 'eaven shine
Wiv everlastin' light:
And then . . . I knew that I'd got mine,
As 'e got 'is last night.

Aye, bang beyond the broodin' mists
Where spawn the mother stars,
I 'ammered wiv me bloody fists
Upon them golden bars;
I 'ammered till a devil's doubt
Fair froze me wiv affright:
To fink wot God would say about
The bloke I corpsed last night.

I 'ushed; I wilted wiv despair,
When, like a rosy flame,
I sees a angel standin' there
'Oo calls me by me name.
'E 'ad such soft, such shiny eyes;
'E 'eld 'is 'and and smiled;
And through the gates o' Paradise
'E led me like a child.

'E led me by them golden palms
Wot 'ems that jeweled street;
And seraphs was a-singin' psalms,
You've no ideer 'ow sweet;
Wiv cheroobs crowdin' closer round
Than peas is in a pod,
'E led me to a shiny mound
Where beams the throne o' God.

And then I 'ears God's werry voice:
"Bill 'agan, 'ave no fear.
Stand up and glory and rejoice
For 'im 'oo led you 'ere."
And in a nip I seemed to see:
Aye, like a flash o' light,
My angel pal I knew to be
The chap I plugged last night.

Now, I don't claim to understand --
They calls me Bonehead Bill;
They shoves a rifle in me 'and,
And show me 'ow to kill.
Me job's to risk me life and limb,
But . . . be it wrong or right,
This cross I'm makin', it's for 'im,
The cove I croaked last night.
Written by Ben Jonson | Create an image from this poem

To Playwright

XLIX. — TO PLAYWRIGHT.    PLAYWRIGHT me reads, and still my verses damns, He says I want the tongue of epigrams ; I have no salt, no bawdry he doth mean ; For witty, in his language, is obscene. Playwright, I loath to have thy manners known In my chaste book ; I profess them in thine own.

Book: Reflection on the Important Things