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Café Comedy


I'm waiting for the man I hope to wed.
I've never seen him - that's the funny part.
I promised I would wear a rose of red, Pinned on my coat above my fluttered heart, So that he'd know me - a precaution wise, Because I wrote him I was twenty-three, And Oh such heaps and heaps of silly lies.
So when we meet what will he think of me? It's funny, but it has its sorry side; I put an advert.
in the evening Press: "A lonely maiden fain would be a bride.
" Oh it was shameless of me, I confess.
But I am thirty-nine and in despair, Wanting a home and children ere too late, And I forget I'm no more young and fair - I'll hide my rose and run.
No, no, I'll wait.
An hour has passed and I am waiting still.
I ought to feel relieved, but I'm so sad.
I would have liked to see him, just to thrill, And sigh and say: "There goes my lovely lad! My one romance!" Ah, Life's malign mishap! "Garcon, a cafè creme.
" I'll stay till nine.
The cafè's empty, just an oldish chap Who's sitting at the table next to mine.
He I'm waiting for the girl I mean to wed.
She was to come at eight and now it's nine.
She'd pin upon her coat a rose of red, And I would wear a marguerite in mine.
No sign of her I see.
It's true my eyes Need stronger glasses than the ones I wear, But Oh I feel my heart would recognize Her face without the rose - she is so fair.
Ah! what deceivers are we aging men! What vanity keeps youthful hope aglow! Poor girl! I sent a photo taken when I was a student, twenty years ago.
(Hers is so Springlike, Oh so blossom sweet!) How she will shudder when she sees me now! I think I'd better hide that marguerite - How can I age and ugliness avow? She does not come.
It's after nine o'clock.
What fools we fogeys are! I'll try to laugh; (Garcon, you might bring me another bock) Falling in love, just from a photograph.
Well, that's the end.
I'll go home and forget, Then realizing I am over ripe I'll throw away this silly cigarette And philosophically light my pipe.
* * * * * The waiter brought the coffee and the beer, And there they sat, so woe-begone a pair, And seemed to think: "Why do we linger here?" When suddenly they turned, to start and stare.
She spied a marguerite, he glimpsed a rose; Their eyes were joined and in a flash they knew.
The sleepy waiter saw, when time to close, The sweet romance of those deceiving two, Whose lips were joined, their hearts, their future too.

Poem by Robert William Service
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