If Loving You Was A Sin
If loving you was a sin,
Then I’ve sinned in silence every day since you left.
And I’d do it again.
Every lifetime. Every breath.
They told me,
“She’s not yours.
This isn’t right.
You’ll ruin everything.”
But they don’t know what it felt like
to hold a world in my hands
and have to let it go
to keep it from burning.
They don’t know what it does to a man
to love someone with everything inside him,
and still walk away
because the world told him that love had no place here.
You—
You were never mine on paper.
But in every way that mattered,
You were already home.
I see you sometimes,
In dreams I don’t deserve.
You wear that same look—
The one that asks,
“Why didn’t you fight for us?”
But love…
you were the only thing I ever did fight for.
Even when I lost.
Even when I had to pretend I didn’t still see you in every goddamn moonlight.
But my voice gets lost
between honor and heartbreak,
between what they wanted
and what we were.
Still…
If I ever get one more chance—
I won’t ask the sky for permission.
I won’t ask the gods to bless us.
I’ll just take your hand,
and say:
“Let them curse me.
I was yours anyway.”
And if I’m damned for it,
then so be it.
I’ll go to my grave loving you.
And in the next life?
I’ll find you again.
And again.
And again.
Copyright © Ikshitaaaaa ghosh | Year Posted 2025
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