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You

and time seems to still into
a whirlwind of colors
or maybe it's just You

You shine

so maybe for today repeated
each crumpling brown leaf
will be eyed as a blossom
don't I deserve this deception

don't We?

and each color seems to swirl
an array of art
so abstract no hunter
could pinpoint You to a frame
Your movements a dance
the song of the wind
Your gentle smile beckons Me

who wouldn't
fall

and even if the drop kills Me
I'd do it again
for no hell could unleash wrath
greater than not knowing You

Your smile
You
Your eyes
You

and maybe for today repeated
I'll let Myself believe
that fate is My companion
that fate made me a Boy

Copyright © Susie Jones | Year Posted 2024

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Date: 5/27/2024 11:14:00 AM

This is an interesting form. I love how you have created such strong emotions. Congratulations! :)
Date: 5/27/2024 9:40:00 AM

Dear Susie, I adore how your title is incorporated into the first verse. Your poetic introspection is nuanced with conflicting emotion, colored with creative imagery and evocative metaphor while coaxing my heart's imagination with subtle yet insistent questioning. A thought-provoking, intimate and superb piece. Congratulations for your win in Charlotte's contest. Warmest wishes.. ~Susan
Date: 5/27/2024 5:06:00 AM

something about this stood out for me, and grew on me with repeated readings..i like the second and third stanzas particularly, and i love that ending (i always look closely at the ending) congrats on your win in my contest!

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