counting down the days
Look god
I know there’s a way people usually pray to you
But I don’t work that way
So I’m gonna just say what I have to say
I want to love you
But you cant
I struggle
And I know there’s not excuses
For the thing I’ve been doing
And I’m not gonna stop
But I’m still saying sorry
But I guess it’s a worthless apology
It’s hard to love you when your shoved in my face
It’s a hard thing to take
When your mother doesn’t love you
Only enough to show you
God
But she doesn’t actually care
She just what’s me to pray
And praise for the rest of my days
You ever heard of out staying your welcome
You’ve been here for so long
I’m counting the hours
The hours till I’m out of this house
I’ve been ready to leave for years now
Looks pretty and yellow on the outside
But really it’s filled with yelling and crying
wishing I was dying
lying
I’ve been ready to leave for years now
Me neither
I don’t see much of her these days
I feel bad because now that she’s older
She’s gotta this bolder over her shoulder
Of these kids she’s got to raise
Counting down the days
Hoping that when she leaves
These little sweet kids don’t get treated this way
I hope they have words
Words that they can say At least Not my age anyways Breathing in all these religious fumes
I’m suffocating
No way of alleviating
I have words
I’m just not allowed to say
But I will one day
I’ll let all my words out
I had to grow old at a young age
I think it’s always been this way
I don’t remember having fun with anyone
Remember that little sweet Girl you raised?
Copyright © Autumn Hawkins | Year Posted 2025
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