Unmet Dreams
I remember just a few years ago
I remember me feeling so excited
I couldn't resist smiling
I couldn't resist thinking of my future
Today I'm going to be honest
Honest with you and
Honest with myself
I have never archived much
I have never enhanced my life
Life has been hard for me to Override
Listening to sad Soul music
Has been my life for a decade
Pure hate
Pure misery I remember
Beating myself up with shame
So much hate it wouldn't go away
So much tears my pillow became wet
So I would hide from my mother
I remember clicking at everyone
It's just feels like yesterday
Well honestly I still am angry,
Don't worry you wouldn't understand
Do you know ?
Do you know how it feels like?
Going to bed with a sore heart
Who am I kidding ?
I am just a boy who was ment to sleep at the kitchen
I guess you are wondering
Yes life has gobbled up my SOUL
I feel HELPLESS
PLEASE HELP ME.
I lost my pride very recently
Thanks to my life I have nothing to lose
Thanks to God for bieng angry at me I understand nor I did nothing wrong
May my SOUL regain sound through
Music and time, I doubt it .
Do you know
Do you know how it's like to be the only one in the family without a job
Do you know how it's like to be begging in prayer
Crying from the inside I PRAY
For I have realized that I am the PROBLEM HERE
it's hard bieng a burden to Mom and sis but I have no choice
I have no one to turn to
I have again realized that without a soul I can't be living
But I am ,I wonder how ?
I remember bieng in hospital
Laying there in bed
I felt different
I felt like the torture was over
The hate was over
The rumors were over
I felt like I was in a quiet place
Where nothing matters
No thoughts just me and the dark
No hurt ,no pain I still feel it when I hold my breath
It's me "Him" he who God does not know
Him who has no degree but a matric certificate
He who is jobless at time flies by
He who is a stranger to many
Undermined by many
But hey I'm okay with that
It's my life I'm used to that
Actually NO ,I'm not OKAY
I FEEL LIKE CRYING
CRYING UNTIL THE OCEAN SPEAKS TO ME
CRYING UNTIL I BLEED
CRYING UNTIL I BECOME weak
Until ... God knows what .
Unmet Dreams.
Based on a true story.
Copyright © Ciar Luminous | Year Posted 2020
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