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Bindhu Grashia Poem
Words stumble out of my mouth, I grope for words
Trying to pull words out of thin air
I rack my brain for thoughts but it wouldn’t budge
I stare at things for long time
Just trying to figure what my thoughts are
Looking from another perspective I try to gather what my feelings are
Is it joy, is it happiness is it peace?
Maybe it is calm; it is the smile, maybe the laugh
It is the tear, Is it love?
Maybe it is pain, sorrow
No, it is the feeling when you drown in the cold arctic ocean
The paralyzing of body and the numbness of the brain
It is the helplessness, the hopelessness,
The fear that is what it is.
The unbearable pain threatening to hang over us
Is this what I think?
The word is simple; it is life that I think about
And it is all the above
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2017
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
If you think taking loads of morphine before it starts hurting
Might help, heal the pain or at least reduce the effect
You are wrong, laws or rules fail here.
You will feel the pain no matter what you do
No medicine in the world can cure it.
This layer of protection, you think you have
Well for pain, it is just like a sheer paper
It tears right through as if nothing ever existed
it hits you right where you never wanted it to hurt
It hurts you like a migraine
One where the darkest black is neither black enough nor dark enough.
All the sad songs in the world couldn’t sum up how you feel
the pain is so deep that nothing ever feels right
It is going to reside in there for as long as it wishes
And destroy you from within
it crushes your soul, your hope
The best you could do is wait.
Wait ...and wait ...
For it to be done with you.
For it to leave parts of your heart and soul
scattered and battered
so you could glue back the pieces together.
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2019
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
I feel suffocated
I feel trapped, unable to breathe
Unable to move, unable to think
Why? oh god, why?
What did I do to displease you?
It is dark, it is cold, yet it is full of light
It is warm, yet it is burning hot
It is new, yet it is dull
The cry of someone, are they worried are they sad
Are they happy, I don’t want to know
But want to go back
I want another chance yet here I was
I want to get out, move away
But cant, what wrong did I do?
I will do anything to go back, but it is too late
I opened my eyes and there was this light
Trapped in this form they all stare
They all smile?
Now that I am in hell
What choice do I have other than go by the rules of Lucifer
Someone passed me around
I realized, I was on earth
Everyone around me smiled and cheered
As I cried for a way back
For I was not with Lucifer but was in hell a Lucifer myself
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2017
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
I remember the day I entered
The sacred ground of yours
Was happy you accepted me,
When the love of my life rejected
I was happy you welcomed me when I was homeless
I needed to escape the talk, the accusations
Which were behind my back, you told me to ignore them
I shouldn’t have accepted the invite, now I regret
Cause deep down I knew you were not the one for me.
Had our ups and downs throughout the entire time
You held me strong never betrayed.
I tried to fall for you, God knows I tried
But sorry we just didn’t click
I tried to stop and quit but couldn't get myself to it
I tried to jump, but to a coward have you opened your arms
I stayed still waiting for it to end
Knowing I am not the one for you
Cause you were my getaway car
My stop is just miles away.
That is where we will part
Never to see the other again
I am sorry
That is all i can say
I am sorry
But please I beg this of you
Hold me close just that another mile cause I don’t want to get out
Just to step into another
This is about something that happens when you cant get your dream job but in order to pay the bills and survive you take another job where you are stuck.You try to love it but you just can't and you because it was not your dream.
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2018
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
I remember
The smudged ink in my note, every drops of tear that caused it
The long moments I spent bent down
Staring at my note
Not wanting anyone to know what I was going through
I remember
The moments I lost, the sleepless nights
The fear, the panic, the worry
Everything that always knocked the air out of me
However prepared I thought I was.
I remember,
Those moments when I tried,
I tried to squash it, but the harder I tried the more unbreakable the pain became
Every single action led to more and more worry
More and more pain
If it was death I could have handled it
Cause it would have ended soon
But what I felt was pain it was grief
And the worst part was I didn’t know where it ached to treat.
And it stayed and it swelled, a balloon of pain it became
No longer able to hold itself, it burst
It suited itself to spread
To feast on what was left of me
Little did it know it was too late
Cause there was no body or mind for it to dwell
And with the deceased it departed.
In search for another body to feed on
Another soul to feast on.
Collecting memories on it's way
Making memories for the living to remember
The late.
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2017
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
Deep in the dark, I stand
Nothing but darkness surrounds me
“Am I dead?” I ask myself
No, if I were, I would be in heaven
Well seeing as I already lived in a hell
But didn’t they say that heaven is bright, white
Someone said it has angels floating around
Guarding us as we eat and drink
At the banquet set by God
This is nothing like that, well I see nothing
Maybe I am in hell, but I don’t see Lucifer
Waiting to drag me into the ninth circle of hell
I don’t see the Cocytus anywhere near
I don’t feel cold, I feel clueless
Maybe this is the purgatory
Realization hits me, it is slow
I am in space, just space with nothing but air for me to breathe
No friends no foe, except my own mind
I grope around to feel something touch anything
I want to move, to get out
I walk not knowing where I am or where I am going
I walk searching for my sunshine, for just a ray
But I turn up with nothing except for the feeling that I should be somewhere else
Doing something else where I not only have my sunshine but my rainbows
My beautiful life I pictured is somewhere
I just have to find it, before it is too late
I walk and walk with nothing but hope
Hoping I will find it some day
And have my very own fairy tale.
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2018
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
Barren laid the roads
At the passing cars and autos I stare
Wishing it was you, seen everyday
But not since last week
An hour has passed since I last saw a bus
Stops crowding all waiting for you
Waiting for your horns blare
But the roads are barren still
Cars and bikes racing past me
I, wishing it was you
On a strike you guys went
Though good for you
Oh! So bad for me
Cause barren laid the roads without your blaring horn
Miss you in every aspect, as I stand on the platform
No conductors yelling at every stop
Miss you and your so reckless, yet safe driving
Never knew that we had this connection
Now that I miss it, I know now how treasured
Was our five second ticket exchange
Invisible you weren’t to me
Filled with Lorries and cars, yet barren they lay
Miss you passing up and down the narrow center,
Passing tickets back and forth
Waiting for our sweet seconds to reemerge once again
Funny how I miss you scolding me
As I sit there dreaming
Listening to music, head buried in my phone
Not realizing my stop, then halfway along
I ask you to stop, grudgingly you do
But still you do.
Oh! I want you to be happy
Believe me I do
But so selfish I am
I beg this of you
Don’t ever go on a strike again
Because I can’t bear to see the roads barren again
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2018
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
My racing brain doesn’t stop
It is fast, I wonder how long it will last
It moves in every direction,
Without any clear destination
It is past twelve
Maybe I will sleep at one
Tick tock, tick tock goes the clock
My eyes are wide
My brain is up and active
It says I don’t need rest
Why? How can it go twenty four seven?
Doesn’t it ever weaken?
It is one now, tick-tock goes the clock
My brain races hundred miles an hour
Pulls up random things from it's deepest core
The dream catcher on my bedpost mocks,
As the voice in my head talks,
Two..., three.., I am up
Like a Hawk, I watch as the colours of the night change
The eyes are tired from trying to be close all night,
The legs are tired from all the walking,
The racing brain challenges the fragile body
The brain has my brain in a headlock
I expect it to wane, to weaken, to loose
How wrong was I?
Cause, my brain refuses to shut down
I beg this of you, Hypnos
“I don’t want a healthy eight-hour sleep
But an hour, an hour of troubled sleep is enough,
Just an hour, I don’t want to be greedy, just an hour, please”
I cry as time slips, the clock ticks, it shows six
The rooster crows, signalling the close
And there, the brain battle breaks
With insomnia emerging as the ultimate winner
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2020
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
They say it is a crime
To write a poem that rhymes
I was told it was waste of time
They treated me as a slime
Made me bearer of blame
I stood in the hall of shame
And soon I gave up my claim
To prevent my heart from going up in flames
But alas without poetry I am no more
Though my hands are sore
My thought pours, my heart roars
The barrier I built around myself tore
When heaven opens it’s door
Not for me but to that warm heart of yours
To explore,deep inside your heart’s core
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2017
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Bindhu Grashia Poem
How cruel is this world they laugh at me for being different
They bully me because I am not one of them
They berate me they humiliate me
But why? Aren’t we all the same
Aren’t we all humans? But then why do they do that
I turn my back on the world
I try to run,but they chase me
And desperate to escape, I try to disappear
And when I was on the edge of life, he found me
He smiled at me and for the first time I felt hope
He held his hand for me and I took it
He was not one for many words but he didn’t need to be
He is that sort around whom kindness radiates, love glows
He walked me to his home and there she was
with beauty, grace and elegance
without a second thought she took me in as I was her own
And at that moment I knew that I was not alone whatever happens they will be there for me.
When I was happy he too was, when I was sad she would be gloom all day
When I would cry she would weep for me
And when people hurt me she took her wrath on them,
Destroyed them without a trace, swallowed everyone who were mean to me
With her glowing eyes she would burn anyone who would humiliate me
He shot anyone who threatened me
He would sacrifice himself for me if that would help me,
they were there for me as escorts, as friends, as guardians
when I was sad, they sang to me and their symphony was beautiful
when i was scared, at night they were there with their everlasting light
showing me the way, they would never leave even when in danger
they never talk too much, they never talked
but aren’t actions more louder than words?
and the way they act, they did not need words
and how can someone love and care without expecting anything in return?
They were not my kind, my species, my race
How could they understand me so perfectly when my own people did not?
So who are they? Who is the he? Who is the she?
He is the tree, the sun, the mountains, the hills,
the ground, the sand, the soil, the wind
She is the water, the rain, the sky, the flower, the leaf,
the fire, the snow, the moon, the stars
Yes they are nature all around us
They don’t see race, color or country
They see people, they see emotions they see love
They not only help me but everybody all around the world
They are the life
They lived before us, with us, for us, and after us
They heal everyone, love everyone and live with everyone
They protect and care for us
So when someone does so much for us
Shouldn’t we love care and protect them back?
Copyright © Bindhu Grashia | Year Posted 2017
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