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Deadrick Baines Poem
when the pain faded i wanted you there
i left, but not for protection or abandonment,
i left to be seen.
did it end when the words left my mouth?
no,
you left when you decided that words were too much.
i loved you even when my body failed me.
my mouth said the wrong things and my legs lead me in the wrong direction.
but at least i thought i was getting closer to you,
what filled your mind as you walked away from me?
these tears aren’t those of disappointment.
these aren’t regrets i hold, these are lessons dropping into my palms.
every tear is an opportunity for me to realize
how much of you is me
and how much of me is you.
will you let yourself forget me?
or have you already become akin to me?
are we living in the same world yet?
or has your ignorance already lead you to a greater bliss than i could offer?
how much more of my truth do i have to throw away to reach you?
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2025
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Deadrick Baines Poem
my life laid lifeless in your hands,
you decided to be the one to bring me back.
to be the only one i held faith in.
to be the only one to deserve me.
i never asked to get attached to these scars.
it got uglier with every line you drew.
with every cut you made, i healed perfectly.
why would you give me
these beautifully flawed tattoos?
you never answer me.
this mirror is no longer my reflection,
i’m missing.
this body is no more than a reminder.
the eyes i looked at you with.
the tongue that dirtied your name.
the face that you longed to see.
what use am i now?
i can’t handle this alone,
this soul meant to hold two.
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2025
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Deadrick Baines Poem
can i please you?
my heart yearns to be chosen,
to be your sense of direction on the path you choose to walk.
is it selfish of me to want to have your pride
without asking for it?
do i have to be selfish
in order to have love?
open your heart to me
i feel the love i’ve been searching for
in your chest.
why can’t you give it to me?
i promise that i’ll give you the same,
your words aren’t what i want
they won’t be enough,
i am much too selfish to be satisfied.
i need to read between the lines
what you give me will never be enough,
i always resort to stealing from those i love.
do you still love me?
my ears can hear the cries of your past
i am much too selfish
i want to know more than you.
i see the roots under your dirt
the truth i have made from your past that is real,
will you still love me
when my truth becomes too truthful?
when my heart beats, yours should too.
i have told you my selfish ways,
as i become one with you.
your heart is mine
your words aren’t what i need any longer
i already feel you in my chest.
do you still love me?
your heart has corrupted mine,
do you love me enough
to help to draw the line?
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2025
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Deadrick Baines Poem
i often feel as if i ask too much
and say too little.
this time i will not ask, but rather tell.
of how i fear being too much,
and how i was raised on the belief
that love given solely to me was wasted,
that any charity given to me was too
much for me to possibly deserve.
or how my fear of perception has lead me
astray, wasted ideas and potential caused
by my seemingly everlasting sloth.
only this once will i tell you
of how unremarkable i am, and how truly wonderful i believe you to be.
i need you to listen to me, to close your eyes
and do nothing but live through me.
only for this moment.
only for this worthless minute that you will surely forget will i tell you all there is to know.
just this once, i won’t worry
and i’ll let you feel me so deeply in your soul
that you think that you have become me.
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2025
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Deadrick Baines Poem
as i continue walking
i see the flowers of my past
blooming with their beautiful wretchedness.
as i breath you in,
i smell the lies that i let linger,
the thoughts i didn’t dare to think,
this is not love,
this is my performance for myself.
how much of you do i miss?
no, how much of myself do i miss?
what do you see when you see me?
do you see your lies?
or do you see mine?
what did you want me to stop loving
when you told me to move on?
was it only you?
or did you know that it was already too late?
i have already told you,
how much of you is me,
and how much of me is you.
this isn’t equal exchange
it was never going to be.
it ended the moment i smelled your scent,
the fragrance that brings me back to myself.
this flower holds my self,
will i ever be freed?
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2025
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Deadrick Baines Poem
make way, make way,
for a maiden banished from my desolate plane.
she holds her head high
with her bindle in hand, and nothing in sight.
her countenance? fierce yet seraphic.
like divine judgment, contrite yet panoramic.
i watch you leave with wist—
i know you plan to reel me in,
plotting on me, like i’m an oblivious fish.
so used to my lack of adamant action.
you think of me to be a fish in a well,
though i know that to be aspersions;
i’m much more than just a hopeless whelp
described as nothing more than an accumulation of precipitation.
i am the vast sky, with even vaster aspirations.
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2026
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Deadrick Baines Poem
please, just let me be quiet.
don’t let me draw you in, i’ll ruin you.
i’ll say all the right words at the right times.
i’ll sing you the songs of love with a voice you’ll never hear again.
i’ll show you the world through a lens you’ll never get to keep.
i’ll give you all of myself, then i’ll say that i can’t find the parts of myself that i lost.
i’ll keep growing even when you don’t want any more of me.
i’ll be selfish and ask you to give me all of you.
i’ll make promises that i’m not sure i’ll keep.
i’ll give you everything, then tell you how much i thirst.
i’ll tell you how much room i have to experience
and that it’ll never be enough once i have it.
i’ll show you my selfish ways and you’ll be scared that i’ve gotten bored with you.
you’ll start to love me with every fiber of your being.
you’ll build a trust in me that you won’t expect me to break.
you’ll give me expectations that i’ll never be able to live up to.
you’ll demonize me once i finally lose my patience.
you’ll give me a hope that i know won’t be enough to save me.
you’ll make me feel like we’re unbreakable even though we aren’t.
you’ll put me on a pedestal then tear me down once i show you all of myself.
please, just let me be quiet.
if i talk, i’ll ruin this.
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2025
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Deadrick Baines Poem
my flesh is bark.
you, the multifaceted bird,
perching on my vulnerablity
to make deceit-sized openings
throughout every chink in my armor.
you despicable woodpecker.
you ravenous bird,
obstinate on taking actions
which i have labeled forsaken.
most treacherous of all:
polluting my veins with your wretched saliva,
you detestable hummingbird.
i, the irreplaceable organism
with unparalleled benevolence,
can’t seem to escape the rage that ensues
each time i gaze upon your forsaken beauty.
it mirrors me, to every corner of my mind.
like a shadow,
which clings to none other than myself,
incapacitating me with every insult;
nonsensical and baseless conjectures
that somehow strike my roots…
the pleasure of having you so close
yet unreachable.
i wish you would respect my convictions,
because i cannot.
why don’t you understand that?
you ignorant mockingbird.
i wonder if this gravity only exists for me.
you move just fine
as you flap your wings seamlessly
carried by the passion scented wind.
while my leaves may no longer enjoy
the exhilarating rides that the gusts of wind bring.
though, i am not devoid of affection for you.
there were a number or days where i enjoyed
our silent conversations.
when your pecking was not malignant,
but a delicacy of energy i could enjoy
each and every moment.
before the reckoning.
before you unintentionally bared your fangs.
at our end lies a requiem.
as we listen together in our coffins,
i wonder what feelings you render.
is it love?
wistfulness?
betrayal?
sorrow?
goodness,
you take the spotlight in my mind
even as my life flashes before my eyes.
you opportunistic dove. you angelic vulture.
Copyright © DeAdrick Baines | Year Posted 2026
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