Long Funnycomputer Poems
Long Funnycomputer Poems. Below are the most popular long Funnycomputer by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Funnycomputer poems by poem length and keyword.
" On Line "
I want one of those computers
Superconductor duper super science fiction
Like in the films you see
Where the female efficient voice
Tells me everything is working properly
Punch up my memory boost and she quips
“memory boost on line”
thermal nuclear blaster trouble spot ?
“on line”
and then without even questioning
she rattles through the anatomy and itinerary
of my technological wizardry multi functional processor
and “double” no “quadruple” dual core
“chat with thousands of people at once…”
“on line”
“recording every piece of music ever made in the entire world…..
“on line”
“smashing and generally kicking the crap out of virus scanner….
“on line”
“Trojan disinfection and nasty dental torture of their authors……
“on line”
“connecting to the internet for free…
“on line”
“eliminating all computer hijacker, adverts, worms and spybots and castrating their
authors ..is now…on line”.
“you are now ready to have a trouble free and relaxing experience with your computer and
the rest of the Internet….is now…………..on line”
And I will sit there like some Battlestar Galactica
Viper shinny suit as I surf the net
At twice the speed of light.
And there I’ll be fully downloaded, uploaded and completely free
Of Microsoft and its bubble pops
And net hang-ups and freezes
And ITCP’s ( What ever that is )
Gargling with information
The latest news and views
I will cruise
I will not surf
I will cruise
The electric highway
And maybe, just maybe
Have a trouble free
Conversation with someone I cannot see
To clearly.
Things happen today that didn't vex me when I was young.
Seems as I advance in years I can hardly rein my tongue!
Lord, I can't imagine that it's patience that I lack,
But I want things done yesterday, and that's a truthful fac'!
The plumber promised she'd be here Tuesday of last week.
She ain't showed up yet to fix that confounded leak!
The kid who vowed he'd mow the lawn has failed to appear.
He's probably playing computer games and guzzling beer!
The phone is on the fritz and I called about that today.
They'll come tomorrow, or at least that's what they say.
My bewildering computer has developed a baffling quirk,
And I need it to write a poem! I'm about to go berserk!
Alas, the electricity failed just as the super-bowl game starts.
Utilities says it can't be fixed 'til morning due to lack of parts.
My luggage was lost - a great way to start an ocean cruise!
What am I to do, sans my tux and an extra pair of shoes!
Maybe the pace o' living is finally catching up with me.
Lord, why can't other fellers get in step with me is my plea!
I need Your help for deliverance from this grim perdition.
'Twould simplify my life and certainly improve my disposition!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
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