Why I Am the Way I Am
I've been analyzing myself today, pretty hard out,
and I've come to realize I still have a lot of doubt,
what I've written on paper, I don't like what I see,
because one thing there still cripples me.
It cripples me to the point where it triggers everything else off,
the source of my life's drama's, I have only just figured out,
so many years it's been in front of me, I just didn't see,
how my anxiety was crippling me.
Anxiety feeds my anger, anger feeds my rage,
rage feeds my guilt, then in depression I lay.
I can pull myself out of the last four, via coping strategies,
but my anxiety I just can't to seem to control for the life of me.
I must be really so insecure that I let my mind drift so far,
feeding paranoia's once all the insecurity's start,
once it starts I just can't stop because the mania sets in,
always ends the same old way repeating the cycle again.
Why I am the way I am, I have been trying to figure out for many years,
I 'll never give up hope though because I know one day I will be healed.
M.Mahauariki © 2012
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