The Ranch Rat Race

When that alarm clock goes off 'fore dawn's crack And you pull your achin' bones from the sack-- Then you start havin' you some real doubt, If this way of livin's what life's about. So you eat cold bread and drink lukewarm joe-- Look out the window at three feet of snow. Then the wife says to tend to the new calf, As you pull on holey boots and just laugh. Horses need tendin'; cows don't milk themself-- I need a good clone or some magic elf. The wife says somethin's suckin' eggs agin And there's a skunk what means to be our friend. Then next day comes too soon and it's the same-- Your bare feet hits cold floor and leaves you lame! There's bills to pay and more chores yet to do; It just seems like the work is never through. Though this race ain't for rats, it does seem hard; But workin' the city ain't for me, pard. And though the wages is near starvation-- Ain't no better job in all the nation! So if you can stand all my complainin'; You've got to figure I is explainin' 'Bout how I really love this long hard lot, 'Cause I 'preciate all the good we got. So if crankiness you sometimes do find, Just smile and then pay me no never mind. For you see this ain't really no rat race-- It's just how God keeps cowboys in their place.