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The Germs And The Bugs

The germs and the bugs and the viruses
Each of them fancied their chances
The microbes and pathogens all had a go
At giving me evil-eye glances

My bones they were aching, my temperature baking
And then there were chills that would see me a shaking
I thought I might rattle with pills I was taking
And if I dared speak then my larynx was quaking 

But you know and I know that ‘man flu’ is worse
Than anything ladies might lay down in verse
I knew this was true as I took to my bed
While my wife with her ‘girl flu’ was clearing the shed 

Her version of flu didn’t cause her to moan
When cleaning the kitchen, not one stifled groan
And even the vacuum, when she cleaned the floors
Did not make her wince, so she finished her chores

But I am a man and a fighter at heart
Against all bugs I’ll be the winner 
I said to my wife you should have a lie down…
As soon as you’ve finished the dinner.

Well…

I’m better but hungry, I’m feeling half starved
In fact I could eat a large horse
I got bugs that gave me an appetite halved
But now they’ve got me a divorce

Copyright © Terry Flood | Year Posted 2024

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Tom Cunningham Date: 2/3/2024 12:54:00 AM Yikes, know your place woman. What happened to, in sickness and in health.?. Lol. Hope you're keeping well Terry, busy decorating at the moment, been putting it off for years. Enjoy your weekend. Tom Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 2/4/2024 3:13:00 PM More or less better now…. It was a weird one; felt absolutely fine one second and then this thing came over me like flicking a switch. Not sorry to see the back of it.

Christina Bowring Date: 2/1/2024 9:05:00 AM Another great, very amusing poem from your talented pen my friend. Smiling :) all the way. I did chuckle at the ‘man flu’ bit. I will never tire of your wonderful rhyming ability and sense of humour. It’s brilliant! Your style is so unique and top class. I’m glad you’re over your flu now. Let’s hope you keep bug free going ahead. Thank you for another great read. :):) Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 2/4/2024 3:17:00 PM You’re way too kind, Christina. Thanks in abundance ;-)

David Fisher Date: 2/1/2024 5:26:00 AM So much fun in this timely write! Picking out my favorite rhyme is like being at a candy store. Where would comedic poets be without being married to our lovely 'punch lines'? Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 2/4/2024 3:18:00 PM Thanks David. Glad you enjoyed

Ilene Bauer Date: 1/31/2024 2:07:00 PM hope you're feeling better, terry! i enjoyed your humorous take on "man flu" and laughed at the ending... Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 2/4/2024 3:23:00 PM Thank you, Ilene. Still a bit throaty and sniffly, but getting words on the page again. Not sure any of it amounts to much… maybe I’ll cross my fingers and post a couple.

Paula Goldsmith Date: 1/31/2024 9:23:00 AM I really enjoyed reading about your fun Germs/Bugs write. Thanks for the laugh. I needed that... So glad you are feeling better with No divorce. In sickness & in health!!! Have a fun/wonderful day writing away............. Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 1/31/2024 10:28:00 AM Thanks, Paula. The flu was for real but all the bed rest and pills were make believe. No ‘man flu’ in my house. ;-)

Deb M Date: 1/31/2024 8:09:00 AM You can even make feeling so unwell humorous Terry! Glad you are feeling better my friend! Deb x Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 1/31/2024 10:31:00 AM Didn’t feel too funny at the time, Deb. Wrote this during but I couldn’t quite get it right. Glad you enjoyed my poor health ;-)

Anne-Lise Andresen Date: 1/31/2024 6:05:00 AM - Smiling ... you said it: 'man flu' is worse ... get well soon, Terry :) - hugs Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 1/31/2024 10:34:00 AM ;-) I don’t really do the ‘man flu’ thing, Anne-Lise, but I’ve known a few who very much do… it’s painful to watch. Thanks for your visit. Terry

Tom Woody Date: 1/31/2024 5:27:00 AM I luv bugz! Germs, not so much Login to Reply Terry Flood Date: 1/31/2024 5:28:00 AM I sure didn’t like either, Tom. Pretty much over it now…. And thankfully, no divorce!