The Decision I Make By Not Deciding
By Simeon Austin David Pangu
When i smiled people say thats strength,
Smile denote happiness
No one cared about the length,
Of my pain and weakness.
Perfect in the world of imperfections,i tried to be,
So when I smile the pain within no one get to see.
Instead they smile back at me,
Oh how I wish my pain they could see.
A whitewashed tomb, i am,
Fooling people with my smile because I just can't frown.
Despite thriving towards perfection
I'm the weakest of all creation,
What is strength if my mood is static?
The meaning people attached to smile, isn't it ironic?
Is this what they called strength?
Isn't it sarcastic when they say smiling is wealth?
The smile lingers on even when stressed,
I hate to smile! That i must confessed
But that is what keeps friends around,
And am too weak to scare them away by stop being the smiling clown.
Go away smile go away
Do I need you for another day?
But you are the reason,around me are my friends,
Sadly my answer is a supposed yes.
My smile is fake! It all impression management,
To please those around i had to, even when mind and soul is in torment.
To smile is the decision i make by not deciding,
And that hurt even when others start complimenting.
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