The Annual Rustler's Rodeo Roundup
Yee Haw! Y'all came when I called, my five rowdy friends,
It's that time for the Annual Rustler's Rodeo Roundup again!
Let's saddle our ponies, ride, rope, and rustle their cattle,
We'll round up their ramblin' ramblers, then just skee-daddle!
Next, drive those buckin' broncos to our hideout down south,
So we can sell em' to buy whiskey for dry opened mouths!
Those Senoritas, who need us, will feed us beans and fajitas,
Then bed us and please us, till we all say...Lord help me Jesus!
If anything's left over, we'll buy you a pup from that dirty sheep drover,
At ten cents a pound, we'll bag you that bloodhound they all call Grover!
And Wiley, didn't you want to marry that dance hall gal, looks like a pixie,
I'm guessin' she'll keep doin' more fine fiddlin' and diddlin' on your dixie!
Me, I'm gonna get me a real fancy-schmancy, gold-plated saddle,
Hell, we'll buy everything we can with their mindless rusty cattle!
It'll be more women, lots more whiskey, and more comforts galore,
Shoot, we might even open up our own gosh dang, dark, dusty store!
We'll rob the trading post on the Mesa, jack up prices on customers orders,
Then we'll sneek out the back door, saddle ponies and shoot for the border!
Yee Haw Y'all, it looks like we're gonna have one big ramblin' scramblin' ball,
It's "Celebration Sunday" at the Annual Rustler's Rodeo Roundup!...YEE HAW!
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