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Notes About The Poem

PHOTO TAKEN BY JAN ALLISON

Still Life

still life in the graveyard ebon raven caws 09/19/20
Copyright © | Year Posted 2020

Poem

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Leiser Avatar
September 21, 2020 at 7:09 PM
I can picture the chilly atmosphere in just a few well chosen words...great haiku, Jan! Enjoyed this :)
Allison Avatar
September 22, 2020 at 12:24 AM
Thanks Laura and its good to see you back on soup:-) hugs Jan xx
Andresen Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 11:18 AM
- A excellent haiku, Jan - It can be a vampire with raven claws - I think there must be a connection between body and soul ... if there is no soul, there is no one to "communicate with" ... but we do not have to find it at the cemetery - We'll probably find out ... when we are dead - hugs // Anne-Lise :)
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 11:23 AM
thanks for your detailed comment Anne-Lise:-) hugs jan xx
Romios Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 8:25 AM
Congrats my friend. Highly deserved win, Pangiexx
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 8:26 AM
thanks Pangie, out of such sadness I have a poem i will cherish:-) hugs jan xx
Logan Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:44 AM
Glad to see this one as a winner, Jan.
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 8:00 AM
Thanks Jenna, its a special poem to me in many ways:-) hugs jan xx
Bangalee Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 3:57 AM
expressive
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:19 AM
thanks so much Mahtab:-) hugs jan xx
Watt Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 11:25 PM
Please write more haiku, Jan. This one is touching and emotional. The ravens were a nice touch, and I love the photo you took. Very artistic. Congrats for your first place win, I celebrate with you, my friend.
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:19 AM
Thanks John, I had never heard of haiku before i joined soup, am so pleased with the way this turned out, as you know it is a special piece to me for many reasons:-) hugs jan xx
Greener Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 10:43 PM
Short Sweet and thought provoking...I like it
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:18 AM
Its the first non traditional haiku I have written, in this case less is definitely more:-) hugs jan xx
Kelii Kekaula Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 5:58 PM
It's marvelous for me whenever poetic differences a standard "ebon", Jan, congrats on your 1st Place win, Aloha! William
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:17 AM
thanks William:-) hugs jan xx
Dietrich Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 5:33 PM
wowsers, Jan. When did you do this one. Amazing work. FAVE, and congrats with Brian
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:15 AM
thanks Andrea, i had terribly sad news and for some reason i decided to visit the churchyard with my camera and this was the result. its the first non traditional haiku i have written and i am delighted it turned out so well:-) hugs jan xx
Koplin Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 4:50 PM
Peaceful and quiet, I want to be buried by a school yard where there is constant noise
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:14 AM
My ashes are to be scattered at a beauty spot - just hope hubby/ son choose a calm day lol:-) hugs jan xx
Bauer Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 1:34 PM
wonderful picture and poem, jan! so sorry to hear about your sad news...
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:13 AM
thanks Ilene it has shocked me to the core, she was only 33:-( perhaps i can go to the churchyard more often if it inspires me to write lol:-) hugs jan xx
Leffanta Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 11:46 AM
Ravens usually show your place, so don't be to eager for one to land on a tombstone! No rush, plenty of room for you so take your time! Aloha! Rico
Allison Avatar
September 20, 2020 at 7:12 AM
thanks Rico:-) hugs jan xx
Cunningham Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 7:35 AM
Love your haiku Jan, they dont come any stiller than that. Tom
Allison Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 8:16 AM
exactly Tom i couldn't resist using that line with the picture - had tragic news on Thursday I am still coming to terms with it and finding it so difficult - i walked round the graveyard yesterday and this poem came to me - I was trying to get a pic with a crow on the grave but they were up in the trees:-) hugs Jan xx
May Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 7:11 AM
JAN, is that a picture of your backyard how many husbands did you have? Great job Sis!!!
Allison Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 8:15 AM
lol, I'm on the lookout for my next victim I mean husband... how are you fixed lol:-) hugs jan xx
Mcintosh Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 6:59 AM
A wonderful write, dear Jan. God bless you with many more
Allison Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 8:14 AM
thanks Regina, love the new picture:-) hugs jan xx
Buhagiar Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 6:43 AM
Still is very adept description. Don't forget me though. I am not yet still :) ~~
Allison Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 7:53 AM
you are very much alive my friend and long may it continue so we can meet again:-) hugs jan xx
Logan Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 6:32 AM
You just gave a whole new meaning to a "still life." Wonderful lines and your photo does them justice. The Poe-like mention of a raven extols the death. Very good concept, Jan.
Allison Avatar
September 19, 2020 at 7:50 AM
Hi Jenna I had tragic news on Thursday night it has truly knocked me for six she was only 33:-( took my camera with me when I visited mum and found peace as I wandered around the graveyard - the title still life reflected that life still goes on for those left to grieve:-( hugs jan xx
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