Smoking Pressure

waiting to be a part of the group, just ending up at the tail of the joint. bad habits gone wild; broken promises and lies, brooding and waiting that never dies. built up bottles of pressures, not too sure where it comes from. complexity of self-denial complex!!! roads ending up nowhere: trials just trying your patience, looking forward to the beginning, but not the end........ still struggling after being broken, or the pressures of not having experience. redeemful of dim chaos, so strange that this is not all because of this. not to mention a loser so lost, still trying to find life's meaning. too bad the joy can't subside the hurt................